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This is a strange one, but here goes. My dad does not know he was adopted. My grandparents decided not to tell him this because of his learning disabilities (they didn't think he could cope with it). I was made aware of the fact that he was adopted by family ("But don't tell your dad!") and so far I've heard many different versions of the events surrounding the adoption. What we do know is he was born in Mount Morris, NY (1953) and that he was taken from his mother who was not caring for him properly. I want to know where we come from, and I think I have a right to know. All my searching seems to hit dead ends. The only way we can get definitive answers is if Dad registers as an adoptee in NY and how can he do that if he doesn't know...? Any words of encouragement or advice is very welcome. :thanks:
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Yikes.I agree that you should have a right to know where you came from... but my gut is telling me that your father has a right to know, too. It seems to me like you might have to put a pause on your searching and talk to your dad.Once he knows, he may be able to get information via New York's adoption info registry, if that's what he wants to do.I'm not sure what else I could suggest....Good luck.
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Hi Emerald,
Thanks for your reply. I have thought this, too. But honestly - what good would it do to tell him? He's 60 years old and his health is declining (he is almost blind). The authorities took him from his birth mother due to neglect, so she probably wouldn't be the nicest person to know. I've posted on so many forums/adoption websites and it appears no one is looking for him, so my gut tells me to leave it alone. But that doesn't stop me from wondering. I don't think I'd act on any info. I came across, I just want to know why it happened.
Mountmorris,Your dad is ONLY 60 years old. He has a right to know the truth. Now, that doesn't mean he necessarily needs to be told. Some people don't like the truth and would rather remain in the dark.You know your father, which means you know whether he is the type of man that wants the truth or the type that likes to remain happily oblivious.Just because no one has looked for him doesn't mean that no one cares. There are many reasons that a person doesn't look. Only one of them is that s/he doesn't care.... No one looked for me, yet when I found him, my b-father was very welcoming.Did you try looking for a birth announcement in the local Mount Morris paper? As it is a tiny town, he may have been the only baby boy born on that date. Maybe there was a birth announcement. You could TRY ancestry.com by inputting his entire birth date and the town in which he was born. MAYBE you could find something there.Good luck!