Confused

I placed my son last month. I picked the parents prior and they were there for the labor but I needed the birth to be just me and the dad. I spent some alone time with him and I really tried to convince myself to keep him, but I knew it was not best for him. I was in a homeless shelter with my two year old and my boyfriend who lives in another state had come to stay in the shelter with us for awhile. We were fighting all the time, broke, homeless, and more! I let the adoptive parents come and I felt good to see how much they loved him. The agency lied to me and there was noone there to talk to or anything. I had to get a lawyer from the internet in the hospital who had worked with the agency. I left the hospital with the baby and adoptive parents! We went to a diner to sign the papers! When I got there all the "help" the adoption agency offered me (I did not ask I was offered) was changed or nonexistant. I refused to sign. I told the lawyer I wanted to do this for both my kids and they offered to help us get out of the shelter and back on our feet and that is what I wanted. We left and my boyfriend begged me to let the adoptive couple take the baby home with them and not bring him back to the shelter. I reluctantly agreed. The next day we spoke back and forth with lawyer and agency and finally agreed upon things. We spent some alone time with the baby and then went to lawyers office to sign papers. Its now almost 2 months since he has been born. The agency did not follow through on what they said. When I told them I wanted the baby back (before the time was up) they ignored me. They dont answer me or even the lawyer now. They said that it looked like I tried to sell my baby and can get in trouble for that. I know he is still better off than with me. My boyfriend had to go back to his home and I cant move there. I will probably be evicted next month since they did not send the help they said. I am tired and I know if I were getting up in the middle of the night with a newborn I would be running on fumes. But I miss him. I feel I was preyed upon and used and it makes me mad. My boyfriend is furious too and told them more than once he wants the baby and will raise him alone. They told him he has no rights and then just ignore him. I was going to meet up with the adoptive parents recently but I was not sure I could handle it and I thought they were just being nice. I wrote her and told her I appreciate what she was doing but I realize we are not friends and she owes me nothing, I told her she is cool but I did it for him not her. Pics and letters every now and then are enough. I miss him all the time. I dont know what to do or how to feel. I appreciate being able to vent and cry. Thanks for listening.