Questions to ask when getting a call for placement

Thank you!

To add on, here are the medical questions I sent when we got the call on my preemie son. A few of them seem pretty naive after the last two years of caring for him.- Was he exposed to drugs and/or alcohol in-utero? - If exposed to alcohol, does he show any overt signs of fetal alcohol syndrome?- Did he have any brain bleeds? If so, what grade were they?- Have his eyes been checked for retinopathy?- Did he require Patent ductus arteriosus (PDA) repair?- Is he just on supplemental oxygen? Or is he still on a ventilator or CPAP machine?- Does he have any issues with apnea or bradycardia?- Does it look like he will have lasting lung issues? If so, how severe and what do we need to do for it?- Is he reaching his developmental milestones appropriately? (I do mean appropriately for a micro-preemie) If he has excessive delays, what are they?- Is he able to eat on his own? or is he still being tube or IV fed?- Are there any suspected major abnormalities? - How much did he weigh at birth? How much does he weigh now? Is this a good rate for weight gain?- Does he appear to be able to see/hear?- Is there anything else I should know about?- Does the NICU recommend/allow "Kangaroo Care" for preemies?- How well does he sleep?- If everything goes well, how soon would he be allowed to come home? (rough guesstimate is fine)- Does he have any deformaties? cleft lip/palate, club foot, etc.- Does he have cerebral palsy?- Is he responsive to and enjoy touch, or is he stiff?

And from a newbie who is not so much a newbie now- at least to GETTING calls... it gets easier! The first call I was a nervous wreck- ended up being our first placement- Squeaks. I did really well asking the relevant info for her- but I told the PW I wanted to talk to DH- which she totally understood...and I said I would call her right back. WELL- I forgot to get her name or extension! And if you try to dial back any of our cabinet department numbers it takes you to the main line. I had to do some asking but finally got back to her- and she laughed at me in a good natured way. My stomach drops the moment I see that pre-fix number show up on my phone- but now I am calm enough to ask all my questions AND get the number of the PW, lol. Another thing that never hurts to ask- is if you have more questions than the placement worker can answer- I have asked to speak with the case investigator. They are usually so desperate in my area to place- they are pretty open and willing to discuss the situation with you. I am glad I did in one case because the investigator gave me a TOTALLY different story than the placement worker. As it turned out- they were not even sure the baby was going to enter care and court had not happened yet to get the ECO. And finally- I think this comes up a lot but it is so true. Ask all you need to ask- but know that sometimes their info is wrong. You will hear all kinds of situations where the race is not what they say (Like with Squeaks)- the drug exposure is not what they say, sometimes the ages are off by months to years! Just take everything with a grain of salt. I have come to the point of "I'll believe it when I see it!" with a lot of this info.

This is very true. The information I got from the hospital social worker was different from what I got from the nurses who were doing Buddy's daily care. Plus the situation is constantly evolving with these kids. You may have a child that appears to be doing fine, who completely cracks and starts acting up once they come home. With my son, I was told he might come home on oxygen, but was otherwise doing great. A year in, Buddy has apparent CP, feeding issues, major GI problems requiring surgery, etc, etc, etc. However, he's an incredibly happy, delightful little boy.

Thank you! These are all helpful!

Thank you so much for sharing, blueflower!!!