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Originally Posted By Desperatly worried parents
My husband and I just adopted our handsome son of 18 months. We have agreed to stay in touch with the extended family since his aunt was fostering him. I did not mind keeping close contact with his extended family because they promised us that they would not tell our sons parents where he is leaving and that they will continue contact with us. My family is very afraid that the extended family knows where we live. I wasn't scared before but I am a little worried. My husband and I have agreed that once he was placed in out care for good that they would not be aloud to be left alone with him at there place or bring him places alone. We have know problem them coming to visit him however we are afraid even if we went to visit that his parents would show up and cause trouble. Because the extended family has told us already that he has come for him once before the court date was finalized but his family said know. My husband and I would like to know other people's advise, comments or suggestions on this matter. Like my sister told me that she was glad that we made that decision because he is our little son now and we have to protect every possible way.
Sincerely Desperatly worried parents
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Originally Posted By bina
I think you can decide to limit the contact to only in your home if that's what you need to feel safe. I pray that over time all sides will come to trust each other and that the need for limitations and secrecy will be very reduced. Good luck to you!!!!!!!!!
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Originally Posted By DeeDee
You need to protect him but if you made that promise, you should keep to your agreement. I would recommend liimited visits in a public place. Make it very clear to the extended family that you will NOT allow the birthparents visits, and if they violate that, you will stop visits. But don't just stop them without letting them know, that is not right. If they cared for that baby, they have a relationship with him, he has right to know them. Unless they brake that agreement, stick to the agreement you made with them. But be honest & upfront about that.
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