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Hi Everybody,
My husband & started the process of adopting through foster care. We live in San Bernardino county. We have all our paperwork submitted; Just waiting to be assigned to a worker.
I was wondering with other (Married) couples, who have adopted through foster care, were you required to attend counseling?
When we met with the adoption worker prior deciding if we wanted to adopt. She told us we would have to attend counseling.
She wrote me & said, I discussed one of the concerns/challenges that you guys face for potential adoption Home study approval & adoptive placement.
1) Assertiveness- I am a very sweet shy person. I guess this is a concern for some people.
2) Age difference- my husband & I are 19 years apart.
3) Communication issues in the marriage
We would be required for a counseling assessment to assess if the issues have been resolved with potential impacts on my marriage relationship/stability parenting. After the first visit the home study worker will set up a counseling referral, which can potentially affect the timeline & proceeding of the homestudy, if further counseling is needed.
My husband thinks it's really odd, that we are required to attend counseling, I'm not sure what to think.
Any information would be great.
Thanks,
Bonnie
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I didn't have to do counseling, but we were told from the start that some couples are referred to counseling. From what you posted, I think the SW's concern is primarily with communication. She wants to verify that you have a real partnership, are able to have your ideas and concerns heard, and are not always deferring to your husband. She probably also wants to make sure that you are going to be able to advocate for the kids, appropriately discipline the children and make sure you can handle whatever behaviors the kids may have. I wouldn't stress about the counseling requirement. Yes, it's another hoop to jump through, but you will hopefully learn some good skills handling tense situations.
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I didn't have to do counseling, but we were told from the start that some couples are referred to counseling. From what you posted, I think the SW's concern is primarily with communication. She wants to verify that you have a real partnership, are able to have your ideas and concerns heard, and are not always deferring to your husband. She probably also wants to make sure that you are going to be able to advocate for the kids, appropriately discipline the children and make sure you can handle whatever behaviors the kids may have. I wouldn't stress about the counseling requirement. Yes, it's another hoop to jump through, but you will hopefully learn some good skills handling tense situations.