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I have a new placement. Well I've had her for about 6 weeks. She has been in care since she was 3. She is now 12. She has some pretty extreme behaviors and has been in more homes than she can count. (her words) She wants to be adopted so bad. She just wants a forever home. I have worked very hard at making her feel loved. At this point my husband & I are not pre adoptive & she has been told that. We are really starting to like this girl & have agreed that we are not totally against the idea. We do want to get at least a year under our belts with her and see how she does. We do not want her to know this because we don't want to get her hopes up. We also don't want the CW to know because we don't want her to pressure us.
Over this past weekend her CW took her to an adoption fair. She called this girl tonight & said that 4 couples have shown interest in her. Some of them had some questions such as her fav color, interest, etc. I am surprised that 4 couples are interested in a 12 year old, not to mention one with her history. My question is this. What do potential adoptive parents know at these fairs? Do they just meet the kids and that's pretty much it? Do they know anything about their background or behaviors at this point? I'm just wondering what are the chances that they will get further into the process and get scared away with more info?
I am torn here. I realize that the goal is for these kids to be adopted. I don't want to "hope" against anyone adopting her. Yet, I hate for her to be doing so well here, and then be moved to an adoptive home, and then it not pan out. She has started school & is doing really well so far with us. Yet, it is too early in her stay here for me to blow any whistles and say we would maybe consider adopting. I keep telling myself she has been in care since she was 3 and has already had one adoptive placement fall thru when they were close to the 6 month mark of her living with them. But there is still that nagging voice that tells me how rotten my luck tends to run too.
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At the adoption fair we attended, you just had a chance to meet the kids and do an activity with them. So, you're right, the families really won't know anything about behaviors or past history.
After the fair, we told the CW that we wanted to submit our homestudy for a sibling group. We weren't matched so we never got to the disclosure stage, when they go over all of the child's history.
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