Advertisements
Birth mom is pregnant. A friend who knows the family told me.
Things sound better for her this time, she mentioned that she isn't doing things she shouldn't. This time the father is staying around. Though I'm pretty sure he has had other kids sent to foster care too.
I'm just really upset about it all. I'm afraid the state is going to call us and want us to take the baby or I'm afraid they won't remove the baby and this baby will go through what my daughter has gone through.
Somebody at work said, "it is none of your business, it is nothing to do with you, it would be different if she were your daughter". So the child I adopted is not really my daughter and what happens to her brother is none of my business. Sometimes I can't believe people's attitude towards adoption.
So I'm having a bunch of complex mixed up emotions I didn't expect to have to deal with.
Anybody know what happens if they take the baby away? I'm no longer certified to foster. I'd be afraid to foster the baby because it might mean contact with the birth mom. On the other hand, I know what my daughter would want me to do.
I had heard about this before and I thought sure my answer would be no but now I'm not so sure now that is a real child. Hey, maybe we won't be considered anyway right? I just didn't expect to know about another child living my daughter's life.
Like
Share
Advertisements
Usually the new baby can be placed with you as kinship. I would call you daughters old worker and ask about how that works (which is an underhanded way of alerting her to the fact that bmom is pregnant again). During your call you should indicate that you would like to keep sibs together if possible. That should get you on the radar. It is very likely the case worker will make a note in the file that you called. Then if they do a removal the first thing they do is check mom for a previous history and the file with the note about you should come up.
I so could have written this post 2 years ago. Actually I think I did. A lot of people judged me and said I shouldn't worry about the baby and that maybe the birth mom was doing better. I couldn't NOT worry. Our kids birth mom had moved out of state. I finally called the state she lived in, filled them in on the situation, and decided to let them make the call. I don't know if they ever checked her out, but I did want I could. In her case things have really turned around. I think she is being a good parent to this baby, it helps a lot that the dad stayed in the picture and is a decent guy.