Do any foster kids not have RAD?

I only had one foster child who had attachment issues (not full blown RAD). She was very difficult. If she was my only child, I probably could have made it work. At the time, she was one of five kids in my home so she had to be moved.

My DD had no attachment issues. 5 years post finalization, life is darn near perfect :-):-)

Out of 5 different foster kids, none have had RAD. Our two adopted kids have do not have trouble attaching, but there are some other issues going on. Right now we are going through TBRI training/therapy. It is helping, though we still have a ways to go. We are also learning to see the sources of other stressors (such as sensory issues) as well, which helps. The sibling to our kids lives in a different home. The thing that worked wonders there was putting that child in a home where the head of household was not male. That little detail right there, in my mind at least, gave the sibling the chance to begin healing without the constant fear. The RX before the move was horrible. I thought that child (who we were never called for) would end up in psychiatric care his/her whole life. So, while on paper it may seem horrible, it is not always what it seems. Now, it may be, and it may be worse, so don't assume it the person writing a report is over exaggerating. The child I am talking about was adopted by a resource who had done respite for the child and knew him/her. It was only because of that connection that this child got adopted. If it was up to finding a placement with the RX on paper, I think 99.9% of people would have been scared off right from the beginning.So do they all have RAD. No. Do they all have some effects from the trauma from their early lives or from foster care, probably. If you get into life with these 3 and have more questions, this board is a great place to come ask those questions and seek BTDT advice.

I was in your shoes 3 years ago. If I could go back to myself I would say RUUUUUUNNNNN! Mostly because I have other kids and I have come to believe that 99% of foster kids need to be the very youngest (by many years) or only children. It is only fair to them to have as much time, attention, and resources and possible. And it is only fair to other kids in the home that they do NOT have a new sibling that makes life miserable for the family. But 3 years ago I was an optimist and probably wouldn't have listened to myself. So my other advice would be 1) try respite first so you have a short commitment period to test the waters and 2) wait until all your other kids are grown before going down this road. The potential harm to your current kids is just too great.

Here you go!!!! We have a sibling set of 2 girls, 1 boy. The oldest, 4 yrs old in a month, has been a foster child for 26 months as well as her 3 year old brother. The 2 year old was taken away at birth and was never able to live with her older siblings. They were court ordered to be a sib set and to be placed with a pre adoptive family, us! . They are amazing kids, no RAD, and we're just thirsty for love, structure and affection. While they require a lot of attention, no RAD and they are amazing!!!!! When the match is right, you will know,. The right match can even have RAD but your bond will supercede any fear, your mommy instincts will kick in and you'll fall in love.

It's fabulous that your fosters aren't showing any symptoms of RAD---hopefully they truly do not have the condition because, speaking from experience, it can really wreak havoc on a family if a child has even a mild case. However for those who are not experienced with RAD you should be aware that the effects of RAD sometimes are not seen until a child enters puberty or teen years. There are steps you can take to help minimize RAD and RAD like behaviors but there is no real cure. You can love your child and get them help from every source available to you but that is no guarantee of anything, because love is sometimes not enough, especially in cases like RAD-it is not a cure. But for those parents like myself -you take one day at a time and do the best you can each day.

M--who came to us as a foster-to-adopt placement when she was 10 years old--had PTSD, GAD, and Social Communication Disorder (formerly Aspergers) but no attachment disorders beyond fear of abandonment (after being shuffled through 9 homes in 5 years including 2 adoptive placements prior to us). It took her a year to call us Mom and Dad, and she is definitely a mommy's girl and bonding with DH took a looong time . She has thrown tantrums that left us mentally and physically injured. She was a HARD kid, but not a RAD kid thankfully. And she is becoming a pretty awesome young lady.

Well we have had our sibling group of 3 home for probably 7 weeks now and all is going fabulous! We had transitional visits for 2 months. The kiddos are very affectionate with us, show empathy, remorse, don't go near strangers, correcting their behavior when they get in trouble (very mild issues). They are loving, kind, get along fabulously with the rest of our kids and we are all in heaven! I'm still waiting for the honeymoon period to end but starting to wonder if this just might be their real personalities. Our biggest issue is that our little girl cries at every bedtime but after getting advice here it's going better. So glad we continued with our quest even though we were fearful. Love these kids soooo much!

It is well documented that the normal development of attaching and bonding is disrupted through inconsistent caregiving. This includes biological parents that are unable to care due to drugs, crisis, domestic issues, mental and physical problems, homelessness, lifestyle, and foster care placements. With consistency, routine, scheduling, and the meeting of needs and expectations, in a sense, children do gain some normalcy---over a period of time---"development"needs time to develop. When the inconsistencies become so much a part of their lives, then there are clinical tests and evaluations that the DSM-5 create as criteria for a diagnosis of RAD. This would normally rise to looking at the need for more intense therapeutic help beyond normal counseling or play therapies which is sometimes offered as available to children in foster care. A number of children in foster care have attachment needs, but they do not rise to the level of RAD.