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Hi, ladies and gentlemen.
I’m brand new here, looked through a few threads and realize that I’m at a right point. So many life stories gathered together in one particular place.
Let me tell a few words about myself. I am a lady of 28 yrs old, my husband is 36. We have been dreaming of having a child from the day we got married. No, not a child. Children: two or three. I was raised in the family with three siblings, whereas my husband is an only child. He regrets not having a brother or a sister, though. That is why it was our mutual desire to have a big family. Unfortunately, our dream is not likely to come true. We have an unexplained infertility. I don’t want to go deep into details because this topic is like a nightmare to me. Eventually, we got used to it and started to look for alternative ways to make our family complete. I don’t even remember who of us for the first to say: “Let’s adopt a baby”. It doesn’t matter, actually. The main thing is that it was our mutual decision. Of course, we talked a lot about pros and contras. We realize that it’ll take some time and a lot of our efforts. But I’m convinced that the game is worth the candle.
At this time, we are ready to start… but we don’t know where to start from. We live in Denmark, we have a small house of our own, stable job and no criminal history. I hope there will be no problems for us to be approved as adopting parents. We tend to refer to an agency that will help us with all the procedure from applying to going back home. Oh, yes, probably forgot to tell that we are figuring out adopting from a poor Asian country.
We’ll be grateful if anyone can share recent stories of Asian adoption. What agencies did you refer to? How long did it take? Actually, I have much more questions to ask, but these will be enough for a start.
Impatiently, Emma.
Hi, Emma. I’m also new to this forum but I think I can share my experience with you. I was very excited to know that both your spouse and you agreed on adoption. Moreover, you are open to siblings. This is the very first point to start from. As for me, just a week ago I’ve become an adopted parent. The feelings are indescribable. However, I’m sure that sooner or later you’ll experience it yourself.
Ok, back to your questions. Where to start from? Well, first of all you shall refer to an agency that will assist you throughout all your adoption journey. They will give you the list of the documents needed. By the way, what country are you resident? You shall also determine a country of adoption. We have adopted from China, but I know a couple who have successfully adopted from India. There is a great need of loving families for children there. Children are of different age. Time for referral depends: the older a child, the shorter you’ll have to wait. Referral for siblings is quicker as well. So, are you ready for adopting siblings or twins?
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David, so happy for you! So, you’ve just become and adoptive parent. My congratulations! Is it or boy, or a girl, or twins? How do you feel yourself as a father? How old is the baby you adopted? It would be great to know.
As for me, during the weekends I searched on the Internet a lot. I watched a few video stories on youtube that merely made me cry. Do you know what I noticed? The adoptive children from India are so beautiful! They are like little black-eyed angels. My dh and I tend to adopting from India. There are so many children that need loving parents there. We would like to adopt twins or siblings if they permit us to do so. A bit more complicated issue for us is medical condition of a child. I don’t know if they allow choosing a kid depending on its health. Perhaps, it’s not fair to tell so (I know that children with severe medical conditions also need parents), but I’m afraid that my family is not ready for such a challenge. It would be ok if the condition is moderate or correctable, though. Please, do not blame me for this. I just don’t feel I’m strong enough to do this.
Emma, thanks for your congrats. That’s very sweet of you.
To answer your questions, we have adopted a gorgeous boy from China named Peng. He is five at the moment – a wonderful age, by the way. He is curious about everything. Of course, he is now at his adaptation stage (as well as we) but we’re doing everything possible to make this process maximally comfortable for him.
The children from India are beautiful. Children from everywhere are beautiful. Yours is waiting for you somewhere in the world. Just make a first step to fulfill your dream. India is a comfortable country to adopt from. However, you should know that they will allow foreigners to adopt Indian child only after they exhaust all possibilities of domestic adoption.
As to medical condition, don’t blame yourself for not being ‘strong enough’ to adopt a baby with special needs. The majority of prospective adopters want to adopt a healthy child. And this is natural. The majority of kids is quite healthy or has correctable conditions, so don’t worry. (sorry, if I sound rude in what I say. I just explain things as they are)