Needing some adivce

Hello, I have been on this forum for a while, and wanted some feedback of adoptees who might be facing some of the things I am feeling. I am 20 years old and was born in Romania. So technically I guess I am considered an adult :) I was adopted at one. I don't have any recollection of Romania and what I went through in the short time period I was there. From the hospital to an orphanage then to a foster home then to America. All of those changes I don't remember but I know have an impact on my life today. Now the thing is I have a wonderful adopted home. My parents happily married going on 30 years, and I have three brothers who are not my biological but in my family. It all seems very nice. The thing is I don't have the best relationship with my dad. Which in return has possibly screwed me over in healthy romantic relationships and that is what I am scared of. I have a good life I really do. But I wake up most mornings feeling really down or upset. If I fight with my parents I get a satisfaction or a release knowing that they are paying attention to me. Obviously there is more depth into my relationship with my family. We have tried therapy, but I am going back for myself, hoping to get some more advice. I guess what I am trying to say is if anyone else has felt the same way I feel. I want to be happy but I am starting to feel really low. Or has anyone experienced needing a release from anger instead of taking it out on the ones you love. Yes I have tried the boxing, and writing down my feelings, and meditating. I feel the only thing that has helped me is my stubbornness and the fight with my family. Which if it continues to happen will lead to me being kicked out, which is something I can't do with college and working. I am wanting to hear from an Adult adoptee or even a parent who can relate to what they have faced with their young adults. Thank you for your time, hoping to hear some responses. Allie