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Originally Posted By AbbiHi!I have a 5 yr old we adopted when she was 3 weeks old. We have very little information about her birth mother and no information about her birth father. She has recently started asking a lot of questions, like why we don't have a picture of her with her birthparents; what their names are; and asking if she can see them.I'd appreciate any advice on the best way to answer these questions with the few answers we have.thanks!
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Originally Posted By KSHi Abbi... My only advice from an adoptee with no birth information is to be as honest as possible with what you do have, but in a loving way for your child to still feel valued. She is at an age where children are very egocentric and think they are the center of the universe. Don't be surprised is she feels she is the cause for her parents to have relinquished her. Not having the developmental ability to see outside of her own world, she may feel she wasn't adequate enough... continue to love her and value her presence. There are no easy answers and to do anything but tell the truth will in the long run be detrimental to your child's esteem. IMHO, the best way to answer your question is to say use your own judgment. Your daughter will value any and all info you give her. Good luck.
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Originally Posted By non professional adopteeI think you should tailer your response to her tender young age. Keeping it truthful about what you haven't been told while pointing out what you (her nurturing mother) sees. For example, I imagine she must be beautiful on the inside as well as the out as you are. Either your biological mother or father must be quite smart since you are a remarkably smart little girl. You have a musical talent I would love to take credit for but I would guess someone in your bloodline might be musically talented too. I will take credit for nurturing your blessings like a beautiful seed Mommy waters and tends to be strong and healthy. Enough of that...basically, concentrate on the qualities you see in her and do remind her she comes from a larger gene pool and not just bio mom and dad.