Starting Home Study/Enough $?

Just remember money does not make a good parent! Finances may be challenging, but if a child is meant to be in your life, it will come together some how. Children don't need a lot of expensive stuff to be happy. They need your time and love and understanding. I really don't believe the agency is judging you on finances alone. They will see the effort and ambition you have to make it work. That's what is important. Keep focused on the end result! The answer will come.

I appreciate that! I think exactly what you said!:) I was raised in a very loving familly with no money, so I know it's possible. It's actually my husband who thinks people will "judge" us because of the financial situation right now. We have an excellent agency, so I'm not too worried about them. I guess it's just a general concern!:) Thanks Meg

Don't worry about the home study. I was all nervous too. Our social worker came to the house, asked a few question, looked around the house and left. I have seen a few sites on the internet where people can sell small items( like candles) to help raise money to adopt a child. Also, If you go to your church, they may be able to hold fundraisers to help you reach that goal. If it is something that you really want, then it will happen. It just might take a little extra effort. Anyway, most good things do. Good luck. I wish you happiness as you reach for your goal.

What our social worker (who has been working in adoptions for over 30 years) told us was that as long as you had the means to support a child and pay your bills, then you are okay. I worried and worried about it, too. Some countries, like Guatemala, require that you be within 125% of the poverty line for the current tax year. For a family of 3, that is just under $19,000 a year for 2002. I think that many social workers go on a similar scale. I even worried about our debt-to-income ratio. Most of our debts were adoption-related, though. Other than our house and student loans from college, of course. To finance our adoption, we did a home equity line of credit and took out a small loan. Keep in mind, too, that once the adoption is over, there is a large Federal tax credit ($10,000) and your state may have one, too. We live in a state that has another one for around $5,000. Don't stress about your home study! I did and it was for nothing! It was easy, quick, and simple. Our social worker has been a wealth of information ever since. Good luck!

Please remember that a homestudy is not just something that judges your fitness to adopt. Yes, it has that function, but its primary purpose is to help you become a better parent to an adopted child. In general, you won't even be allowed to have a homestudy if you have certain barriers to adoption. You've probably been asked some of the key questions already in the agency intake process. As an example, you may have been asked some basic questions about criminal history, medical history, and income. Agencies don't want to put time and effort into a homestudy, only to reject an applicant for some reason that was obvious from the start. With regard to income, you don't say whether you are doing an international or domestic adoption. With international, the U.S. Immigration and Naturalization Service, which must approve all adoptive families, requires that family income be at least 125% of the poverty level income for a family of that size. Some placement agencies have higher income requirements, such as a minimum of $30,000 plus $10,000 for each child in the home; however, there are many agencies that judge families on a case by case basis, and in any event, these are the placement agency's requirements, not the homestudy agency's. With regard to your home, it certainly doesn't have to be big or expensively furnished -- or even owned. Many people have brought adopted children home to rented apartments. In some states, a baby doesn't even need to have his/her own bedroom. And no one quibbles if your furniture is a little worn, or you've bought some pieces at a yard sale or second-hand shop. Your home needs only to be safe and welcoming. If you don't have big hazards, like an unfenced pool or broken steps or peeling lead paint, and if you would feel comfortable having your inlaws or boss over to dinner, you will probably do just fine. In general, a homestudy has the following components: 1. Intake -- basic information that will rule out folks who simply shouldn't even begin a homestudy. 2. Data collection. The social worker will need to verify intake information, using documents such as your birth certificates, marriage certificate, divorce decrees (if any), police clearance, child abuse clearance, pay stubs from work, rent or mortgage cancelled checks, etc. 3. Letters of reference. Most agencies ask for a few; some will also need to do a face-to-face interview with a reference. The letters can usually be from unrelated people such as friends, work colleagues, members of the clergy, volunteer work supervisors, and so on. The letters generally should address how the person knows you, what they know about your character, what (if anything) they can say about your relationships with children, and whether they think you would be a good parent. 4. Autobiography (not all agencies require). Many agencies ask prospective parents to write an autobiography, following an outline they supply, in order to guide subsequent interviews with a social worker. 5. Classes (not all agencies require). Some agencies require prospective parents to take a pre-adoption course, as a supplement to the counseling that occurs in the homestudy. This course covers things like positive adoption language, the challenges of parenting transracially/transculturally, dealing with birthparents, recognizing the medical risks, and so on. 6. Counseling. There are usually some meetings with a social worker in his/her office. The most common pattern is one meeting with the wife alone, one meeting with the husband alone, and one meeting with both spouses together. The purpose is to talk about some of the issues in adoptive parenting, so that the prospective parents are prepared to take on the challenges of adoption. It is also to ensure that both spouses (in a two parent family) are on the same page with regard to things like discipline, education, and religious upbringing. 7. Home visit. There is usually one home visit, near the end of the homestudy. As noted above, the goal is to ensure that the home is safe and welcoming. The state usually specifies minimum requirements, which you can ascertain in advance. (As an example, the social worker will probably have to check that you have smoke detectors.) In general, you do not need to have the child's room set up, as long as you can show where it will be. You also may not have to have all the child-proofing done, as long as you demonstrate familiarity with the things that have to be done. Some homestudies require that the social worker meet with any children or others (like a mother-in-law) who live in the home. Most prospective parents agonize over the home visit, clean like lunatics, buy new things, etc. -- yet find, after the fact, that the whole thing is a breeze.

I'm right there with you on the homestudy worries....yes, my basic worries are finances and the condition of my home as well. My husband and I are both in the theatre profession and we simply make very little money, there's no other way to put it....his salary is very low and my job situation is constantly going between "un' and employment. We've always made enough to support ourselves and are sure we'd manage to stretch it over a child. Yet I too was worried about being ruled "too poor" by the powers-that-be. I actually broke down and confessed my fears to an agency today that I am considering and she was the first person to actually give me a baseline dollar amount for bottom range of what is considered "enough money' and I am greatly relieved. Now if we can just get past the house hurdles....the fact that it is run down, needs an exterior paint job and carpentry repair I'm still concerned about. It's nice to see someone else in a similar condition, and know that not everybody out there adopting is financially "set". Hope this helps.

I hear what you're all saying about both finances and the homestudy. I was a nervous wreck when our social worker came for her home inspection (a term that, when I used it in her presence, caused her to explain that it wasn't an inspection, just a visit). We own an old schoolhouse built in 1900. We live in one apartment and rent out the other two...not exactly glamorous. We're annexing one of the apartments to make more room for us and the baby we hope to adopt from Guatemala. Since we can't show pictures of how it will look when we're done, we're just presenting how it looks now and hoping that's good enough. Anyway, our social worker has approved us. Finances is tough. We make enough money to adopt, but have some debt. In fact, my husband brought the debt with him when we were married 5 years ago. We're getting everything paid off slowly, but the $25,000 a Guatemalan adoption costs is not easy to come up with in this economy. My portfolio, for example, is not worth half what it was 2 years ago. We're taking a home equity loan for part of costs, because we didn't have all the cash saved. I hope the Guatemalan government will find us worthy. Sometimes does it strike any of you ironic that some people have babies so easily, and some of us have to agonize over all of it? JP

We had our first of two meetings with our Social Worker yesterday. Everything went wonderfully!!!:) She was very happy with us and said that we would make excellent parents (only after spending 3 hours with us!) I had ALL my paper work ready for her, so no waiting there!! As far as the finances.....she was a bit worried about the countries okaying us (either Vietnam or Kaz). We're both in the process of getting second jobs (actually after she left I received a phone call regarding tutoring!!!!!!!!) I think everything will work out in the end. We just need to make enough to get a stupid loan!!!:mad: You're right, JP, it drives me CRAZY how easy it is for some people to become parents and how hard it is for others. I will keep the faith and continue to pray to God :)

We looked at Viet Nam before selecting China. Then there were a lot of rules changes with China, so we settled on Guatemala. We had enough money for a Chinese adoption, but the whole thing felt wrong to us and Guatemala seemed right to us, so here we are taking out a home equity loan. Anyway, Jim and I are somewhat over weight (like 50 pounds), and the Vietnamese government frowns on that, so we were pretty much excluded. I liked their program, though. I'm also concerned about financial matters after we adopt. My husband is going to reduce his hours and work evenings (he's a technology specialist). That means he will be with the baby during the day and I will be in the evenings, so we don't have to worry about daycare, at least for a couple of years. Our social worker says I worry about money more than is necessary. My Dad told me he was the same way before my brother and I were adopted, so I guess it runs in the family. I admire you and your husband for working second jobs in order to adopt. Someday your little one will come to understand how badly you wanted him or her in your lives and what you sacrificed to bring them home. That will make them feel even more special. Good luck to you. JP

hi, we are in the same boat. please visit my website at adoptionfundraising.com , i came up with this idea after church yesterday. maybe we can all help each other. michelle