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Hi, it's been a long time. My husband and I decided to put ourselves on parent profiles, has anyone done this, how do you feel about it?I'm nervous but our lawyer thought it would be a good idea. So far Catholic progress and word of mouth hasnt done much for us.Tell me what you think.
My husband and I are very excited about parent profiles, we tried calling parishs spreading word of mouth.I'm a RN and told every OB/GYN i knew, so far nothing for almost two years. So i figured what do i have to lose? Parent profiles was a good way of spreading word much farther than print ads,probably alot cheaper in the end.We are hopeful, say a prayer....:)
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We are going through Catholic Charities and it was is our understanding from the very beginning that if you already had children it would be a very long wait. Since we have been married 10 years and have no children and were put at the top of the list. They only have 4-5 babies a year, sometimes more. Have any of you got children at home already, could that be why its taken so long?
Check out parent profiles on adoption.com they have it broken down by state, child, religon so you are in charge.There is an entire BMom area. All couples have to have the homestudy etc...whatever the state laws are, to advertise thru adoption.com parent profiles. My husband are on under Catholic and our home state.I was impressed by the whole approach.:)Good luck
I wish you good luck with ParentProfiles. We were on for a year with two international contacts, a man from Russia was correspondng without his wife's knowledge and a girl from the Ukraine needed 10K to support her mother and brothers. We were also contacted by one woman in Missouri that wanted cash for her baby. It wasn't prolific for us. We've cancelled. I hope you have better luck.:(
Yes, we also had one email from a girl in kentucky only 1 month along who wanted to "meet" all the parents "early on"no proof of pregnancy, she didn't want to call because it made her nervous.This all sounded suspicous to us, i told her that we wanted to talk to her for a bit on the phone first before buying a ticket cross country, she never wrote back.....Then yesterday an email from the Ukraine from a 18 yo girl, long story, and she outright asked for money. I told her we arent doing international, and there was agencies there that she could check into.Don't these scammers realize not all adoptive parents are that desperate or out right stupid? Not to mention money exchange with out a lawyer involved is illegal in my home state and would make any adoption suspect.It is a pain to get these bogus emails and not true birthomos looking for a good family.
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as a birthmom my attorney advised me not to find someone online. he says its risky. he told me he wants to meet anyone i choose from outside sources.
maybe you could ask your priest if he knows any women placing for adoption. the priest in my church is helping me find parents as well as other people that i know.
Originally posted by mintshastagrape
as a birthmom my attorney advised me not to find someone online. he says its risky. he told me he wants to meet anyone i choose from outside sources.
maybe you could ask your priest if he knows any women placing for adoption. the priest in my church is helping me find parents as well as other people that i know.
I have to agree with you mintshastagrape, because we had an unfortunate experience with meeting a birthmom online. However, there are always risks involved in adoption either online or thru an agency. When are b/mom found us we wanted to make sure she would get anything she needed and we both agreed that she would go thru an agency. Unfortunately, she was soliciting other potential adoptive parents for money and promising them too, that they would be the aparents for her baby,even after she signed a contract stating "we" were the adoptive parents she had selected. I agree any birthmom has the right to change her mind, however not to string 3 couples along for financial gain. That is fraud. Needless to say we are no longer pursuing adoption with that particular individual. We have not given up hope though.
i am using an attorney to handle my adoption of my baby. i have my reasons why i wont use an agency. i have great counseling. its not cool to string adoptive couples along. if a birthmom is talking to couples besides just one she should tell each couple she is talking to other couples.
I think its great you have counseling, our birthmom felt it wasn't necessary for reasons I will never understand,even though it was available to her and I encouraged it. She had placed two other children before. Maybe she felt she could handle it, I don't know and never will. Bottom line is she never should have been talking to other parents after she said we were the ones. It would have been different if she had changed her mind and decided to parent, but this was just flat out WRONG! I felt so badly for the other couples involved. We the adoptive parents have all been in communication now. Its good to vent with them sometimes. I was just flat out angry when this happend these other couples are devestated. They all had nurserys and paid her money, I think what they did wasn't exactly right. They were not using an agency they were just using an average attorney to handle the paperowork. I feel its very important for legal representation from the get go so no one gets burned. I feel an adoption attorney is the one who should handle everthing. Every person in the triad must be well informed.
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i agree with you in some ways. if she wanted to talk to other couples after choosing you she should of said something. its flat out wrong to get money from other couples. if i had a family chosen and i wanted to talk to some other couples after choosing someone i would be woman enough to tell them.
oh its okay.
if a bmom chose a couple and then decides to talk with other couples its her right and she should tell the couple she choose she has decided to talk to others. its plain rude not to tell them. my attorney requires that the birthmom and birthdad and the aparents to get counseling.
We are using one of the best adoption attorneys in Wa state, we have been sending letters to parish priest's all over our area. We pray alot and have renewed our homestudy. I feel deep down that we won't find a Birth mom via parent profiles but rather thru Doctors or friends and word of mouth. Having good coundseling and a reputable adoption attorney really takes the stress down. My husband and i decided if we don't find a match by end of August we are not going to try anymore, i have to have an end point to all this anxiety.Dangling at the end of a rope is tough.But i want to also say i am VERY hopeful......have to be, it's all in God's hands anyway.
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you need to do what you think is best for you and your family. everyone has to do what they think is best for them and their family. i hope it all works out for you and your family. i hope you get what you hope and wish for. good luck.