Starting TPR

From a fost/adopt mom in the same boat I just want to wish you all the best! We just got the news this last week that our agency is going to progress with an involuntary-TPR on the b-mom/dad. I will be very interested to hear how the case progresses for you, and to also see what other's say about this process. Our agency is telling us that the TPR/Adoption should be final by the time our child is 15 months old (She turned one year old this month). I guess they process both at the same time? However, I have the very real belief that the bio mom will contest the TPR which could drag it out another six plus months. Until they lift the bar, I will not believe the roller coaster ride to be over. :rolleyes:

I am a foster adoptive parent. We finalized in April, 2002. I really don't know how close my experience is to the norm, but here it is. In January '01, the State agency declared their intent to pursue TPR. It took thirteen months for it to actually happen. Continuances, cancelled court dates, and other delays strung it out for that long. Even though the Judge ruled in December '01, he didn't sign off on the ruling until Jan, '02, because he didn't like the wording of the order written up by the AG. Then we had to wait the 30 days for the appeal window to expire. If the birthmom had decided to appeal, the wait would have obviously been extended. I found that the duration was affected primarily by the efficiency of the court system. Ours was not stellar. :rolleyes: By the way, birth dad voluntarily relinquished. Anyway, I would suggest you hunker down and expect a long haul, and stay postive. If it ends up going faster, I will be happy for you and happy to eat my words. Darwin67, I love your rollercoaster referrence because that is the one I always used. Maybe we all do. Hang on tight to that crashbar. The only way you're going to get TPR done in three months is if birth mom and dad sign off voluntarily, and even then three months sounds like a miracle. They do not process the TPR and finalization at the same time. Unless you've got some very conservative laws in your state, there has to be an appeal period. After that expires you file a petition to adopt and get a court date. You only need 15-20 minutes with the judge, so it usually isn't too hard to get that scheduled Trevor's Mom, You asked about how hard it is to do. Depends on how good Trevor's caseworker and the AG attorney are, and how good the birthparents' attorney is. What I thought was a slam dunk decision (and I was trying to base my opinion on fact and not my personal feelings) ended up being more like a coin toss. After closing statements at the PD trial the judge looked at the two parties and told them he didn't know what he was going to do. I think he knew what was best for the child, but best interest of the child is not the standard used at a PD trial. I think that one of the things that helped or caused the judge to rule for PD was the relationship that my wife and I had developed with our son. I think that he was extremely gratified to see our family walk into his courtroom on the day that we finalized and see how happy and well-adjusted our little two year-old was. That day was the first time I had seen the judge smile in two years of court dates. :cool: Well I've rambled enough. My son is worth every twist, loop, and gut-wrenching moment I went through. My faith and my family sustained me through the doubt. It's an odd beast, this foster adoption. I spent six months focusing on reunification, because it was still viable. From day one I wanted what was best for my boy, and there came a time in the process when that changed from going back to birth mom to staying with us. I am glad it worked out that way

I think that one of the things that helped or caused the judge to rule for PD was the relationship that my wife and I had developed with our son. I think that he was extremely gratified to see our family walk into his courtroom on the day that we finalized and see how happy and well-adjusted our little two year-old was. That day was the first time I had seen the judge smile in two years of court dates. I've asked our social worker about attending court sessions, and until now there reallys hasn't been a need. Also, she hasn't really dealt with parents that have wanted to be in the court for these things, and wasn't quite sure how to go about incorporating us. But I feel that in the case of a pending TPR that it might prove important. I realize that states are very different, but I was just curious what your involvement in the court sessions was. Did you speak, write letters? What do you feel mattered most to the judge where you were concerned? Yeah, I keep telling my better half that 3 months would be a very HUGE miracle. I know in my hearts that the mother will contest...not because she has a leg to stand on, but more that she has nothing better to do with her time, and she treats this process and the social system as a career. I truly am worried about the judge, and that's why I am so keen on being in the court room. :eek:

We are getting ready to finalize our 5th adoption.4 have been fos-adopt. We have been in court for every hearing for every one of them. The birth moms have also been there sometimes. We have never had a bio-parent file an appeal. The time from TPR to finalization has been between 3 and 6 months. Mary

I really expect TRP to be long and drawn out. The social services system here is the pits. They have been saying for a long time that they just don't have enough on the parents to do TPR. I don't know what all they have to have but I can't even imagine what a child would have to go through for them to say they have enough. The bm stays in trouble with the law for drugs and such things and is supposed to have her probation revoked soon and be going to prison. The system has been saying that they are going to revoke her probation since Sept. Since then she has been arrested 6 times and got shot over a drug deal once. The bf is in another state and is also in trouble with the law there. They will definately contest the TPR. Like someone else said it's not because they have a leg to stand on but they have nothing better to do with their time. They do not want the children but they like to put on a show for the courts acting like they want them. The judge gave them both visitation a few months ago and neither one of them ever made any attempt to see the children. At the last court date (which neither one of them showed up for) the judge issued an order that the parents are to have no contact with the children. After 3 years it seems that the system is now ready to help these children. We are preparing ourselves for a long and bumpy ride.

We brought our daughter home last december and was told that tpr would be done by april. Of course here we are a year later and it's not done yet. The court dates keep getting put off for one reason or another. We did actually get as far as the court room once but, someone said something they shouldn't have and the judge threw the case out and we had to start over! So here we are facing another court date at the begining of march. If they do the tpr the mom can still contest it. Our DA told us that an appeal could take forever. It is up to the judge. He said a judge could hear the case and just say forget it your done or he could allow them to keep coming to court as long as he sees fit.

Darwin 67 I never actually addressed the judge in the courtroom during the TPR process. As far as I know, I had the right to, and at times I wanted to, but in my case it was never expedient to. Still, I know that my consistent presence showed the committment I had toward my son. Dress up nice for the judge (shirt & tie, dress, skirt, pant suit, whatever) and be respectful. He/she ought to notice. Courage.

in my foster son's situation, the birth mom voluntarily terminated her rights but they are in the process of tpr the birth dad. i was told that things may go a little quicker (3-5 months) because the dad is incarcerated and they know where he is to serve him the papers. if this were not the case they said it may take longer. he has the right to appeal but i am being told it is a formality because my son is almost two and the father has never seen him nor shown any interest in seeing him. good luck to you and trevor.