Adoptive Parents Have Feelings Too

Much is said in regard to respecting birth parents. And much regarding adoptees. Often, it is assumed that adoptive parents do not struggle.

1. How do I handle extended family members who are resistant to my plan to adopt?

Have an open, honest dialogue with all of them and set appropriate boundaries.

Tell them flat out that if they don't agree with me, they can't have part in our lives.

Plead with them until they understand.

Suggest they get professional help.

2. What is the appropriate way to respond to ignorant questions from strangers about our adopted child?

Ignore the question and change the subject.

Call them out - they should learn right now that it's unacceptable.

Reply with a funny, yet truthful answer.

Take a moment to educate them kindly so they don't make the same mistake again.

Numbers 1, 3, and 4

3. True or False: Hopeful Adoptive Parents will do anything to get a child

True - even if it borders on unethical

False - Adoptive Parents want what is best for each child

4. How should I tell my friends that I'm adopting?

Announce it like everyone announces any birth

Pull them aside and tell them individually

Share the news over social media

Any way I desire

5. If I'm frustrated with my relationship with my child's birth parents, what should I do?

Just bury those feelings - they're not appropriate

Talk with the birth parents and renegotiate the relationship

Tell my child about my frustrations

Keep busy so I don't think about it

6. True or False: I

True - his/her life would have been horrible otherwise

False - Adoption is not about

7. True or False: If I am infertile I should adopt

True - it's the only way I can feel fulfilled

False - I should make sure I've properly grieved and moved on before adopting

8. True or False: All Adoptive Parents are rich ... adoption is expensive!

True

False - Some adoptions are expensive, others are affordable