Okay, I know, I sing it all the time. Sibling adoption is great! And I actually mean it.
Take today, for instance. Our 2-year-old is learning to potty. It’s his first day. He’s been sitting there a lot, more at his behest than mine. Finally, he got a little in there. I’m pretty sure it was an accident, but it all counts. So here is what’s great about having your siblings with you: they got SO excited for him.
I got excited, of course. I cheered, I clapped, I jumped up and down. But it doesn’t thrill him as much as his brother and sister do. He wants to please them. He wants to be them! And it’s so cute. They love to entertain each other, and since they all have the same sense of humor, they do. They totally crack each other up.
But that’s the fun side. I just can’t say it enough. Kids need their biological siblings. My older girls hate the fact that they have siblings they don’t even know. Their siblings weren’t placed for adoption, which I’m sure stings, but the real hurt is in not having that part of their bio family to relate to.
I think this is doubly important in trans-racial families. Having someone that looks like you matters. Nobody wants to be different all the time, so if you have a chance to get siblings, go for it!
The other big advantage that I cannot state strongly enough is that somehow siblings help each other be okay. They gain strength from one another. They take comfort in each other. They have a built in, ready-made friend that they did not have to start from scratch with. So wherever they go (together), in some ways, they are already home. This is absolutely priceless.
I will talk more about nature versus nurture again soon, but some bonds just can’t be invented. It’s magical, it’s mystical, and it’s mysterious, but it’s unmistakable. Something happens between sibs. I’m so grateful to witness it!
Photo credit: Dreena T