Trips to visit family are a great opportunity for us.
As far as I know — or maybe inasmuch as it’s obvious — Dear Hubby and I are the only ones on either side of our family (in this generation) to form our family through adoption. One of my uncles adopted several of my aunts nieces and nephews in my generation ,but because they lived in the Philippines, I really never got a chance to know them. There is just not a lot of precedent for how we do things.
That said, both our families constantly amaze me. They have not only welcomed our children with open arms, they’ve been great cheerleaders and advocates for them. You cannot see any difference in how the family treats my kids verses all the bio kids out there. It’s truly heartwarming.
We are en-route to visit my parents right now. It’s a trip of some undertaking, and I will be glad when we finally get there! The wonderful thing is that once we arrive, my parents, my sister, one of my brothers, my nieces, and nephews (and their children) will embrace my kids in a cocoon of family love. It’s going to be amazing. Even more amazing is that at no time will my kids feel any different than the “born to” kids in the family. We will celebrate Mother’s Day, a niece’s confirmation, and Tinker’s birthday. We’ll visit family in the mountains, we’ll see the sights, and have sleep-overs. We’ll go to church, pull weeds, and bird watch.
The other thing I am hoping to do on this trip is make contact with my half-brother. He is my bio-dad’s child, raised apart from me, and we are virtually strangers. We’ve met 3 times in 50 years, and the last time was at our bio-dad’s funeral. All of my kids have birth half-siblings they don’t know. I am hoping that seeing me work through the issues in order to make contact with him will help them in later life. Both my half-brothers’ parents are deceased now, and I think the family ties have become important to him. He’s a fisherman and an expedition leader, so who knows, maybe we will have an adventure too!
Although as a mother, family gatherings can be a little stressful because you never know how dis-regulated your kids may become, as an adoptive mother it does my heart good to know that Dear Hubby and I are not the only ones wrapping our arms around these kids and loving them unconditionally. I think it does them a world of good too!
Now if we could just hurry up and get there!
Photo cred– Dreena