Advertisements
I recently found my b-mom, and just discovered that I am the child of a rape. While I am still pretty numb, I feel some anger and some shame. I also have to say that I have deep respect for the decision that my b-mom made, and I've had a fine life. I have no ill-will toward my b-mom, only the hideous men that perpetrated this crime. I guess I'm writing this to find out what I can do to deal with the feelings of anger, shame, and just profound sadness that I feel on some levels at this point, as well, if anyone has any advice on what I can say to my bmom, as well as aparents who do not know about this development, to let them know that while I have some sadness about it, I am not at this point tormented or overwhelmed by it, nor do I feel it will overtake my life in any way. I mention my bmom specifically because she has stated that she does indeed want to know me, and has been very welcoming of having me in her life, which I hope will continue. Any sage words or advice from posters will be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance, GinaD
Like
Share
Hi Gina, I already answered your earlier post but will give the same reply to this one incase you miss the other one. Try this Site: [url]http://www.stigmatized.org/[/url] It is a 'member only' site for people who were conceived from Rape or Incest. I hope it helps. All the best to you. Regards Pandora
Advertisements
I, too, was conceived as a result of a rape. The thing you must realize is that it isn't your fault. Your b-mom doesn't blame you, and you shouldn't blame yourself. You are not an accident, though the circumstances surrounding your conception aren't the best, you, just like I, were meant to be. I am a Christian, and I believe what the Bible tells me in Psalms 139 - the entire chapter. "You knew my frame far well when I was made in secret.....I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made." Knowing who I am in Christ, has helped me. I learned the reason my b-mom didn't keep me had nothing to do with the circumstances surrounding my birth, but that she was young (16 years old). She grew to love me, and did indeed want to keep me. My story was featured in the June 17, 2003, issue of the adoption.com emag. If you would like to read it it's entitled "He Did This for Us." I hope it encourages you. Hang in there, my friend. Love & prayers - NikkiLGA