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I would like to hear some opinions from other adoptive parents for my situation.
I had this friend who was pregnant and had nowhere to live. I talked my boyfriend into letting her live with him until the baby was born, he agreed. After the baby was born (9/26/03) she decided she didn't want to be a full-time mother, therefore it was up to me to care for this precious boy. I raised him for about 3-3 1/2 months, until I took him to his (who we thought at the time) paternanl Grandmother. She cared for him during the day while I was working. I can go on forever, but to make a long story short I became so attached with my sweetpea and he is now in foster care getting ready to be placed for adoption. I am heatbroken, not for the fact he is going to be adopted, but I will never be able to see him again. Last week I went for my scheduled visit and told him good bye. I couldn't keep seeing him knowing he is going to be taken from my life. From day one I whispered to him that "Auntie" will never let him be in harm's way. In a way I feel as if I'm letting him down, but in my heart I know he will be safe and loved, and he deserves to have a Mommy & Daddy.
The advice that I am seeking is I'm in the process of completing a scrapbook that I've started for him. It is from the ultra sound til now (9 months). I also wrote him a letter from me explaining how I know him and how he was so much a part of myn life, not being to detailed, but to the point. I also wrote a letter to the adoptive parents asking for reunification someday. I'm not pushing the issue and explained to them that whatever their decision, I will respect that. I am in need of advice. Please help me with this. Should I share all of this information with them or just let it go?????
... but in general, as an adoptive parent, I'd never turn away any information about my daughter's birthfamily. What would you be afraid of telling them, and why? I suspect there isn't anything they wouldn't love to know about.
Hope this helps,
K.
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Hello K,
Thank you for that little bit of advice. I guess what I am afraid of most of all is not knowing if he will ever get to see what I sent with him. When he is old enough to understand I really hope he is able to see the people that were in his life and know how much we love him and how special he is.
This is all new to me and I guess I am thinking the worst, but it is really the best for him. Reading other stories from adoptive parents makes me so thankful that their are such special people in the world.
Thank-you,
Jamie's Auntie
I am happy to say baby Jamie is coming home, for good. On January 5th he will be reunited with his birth mother. The birth mother and I also reunited after some time, she began programs to help her with her drug addiction and parenting. She is doing awesome! She is now living in a halfway house and is able to live there up to 2 years with the baby. She has had overnight visits with him and does wonderful. The best thing is that she only lives 5 minutes from my house and I am able to see the baby every week when she has him. He was able to spend Christmas with us and that was the best gift ever. He is still such a happy precious baby boy. He has bonded with her very well and doesn't let her out of his sight, it's great. Thank you for the advice and info on this matter. This really is a dream come true!!! :)
That little boy is so lucky to have you in his life. So is his mom. What a wonderful Christmas.
Congratulations,
Martha
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