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Originally Posted By Melanie
Hi - I have a 2 1/3 yr old bio son whom I love with all of my heart. For medical reasons, my Dr. has strongly advised me to not have another bio child. My husband and I have the paperwork completed to begin the adoption process but I keep dragging my feet. I think I am afraid that I won't have the same depth of love for my adopted child that I do for my bio child. I'm also afraid that I won't see my adopted child in the same "perfect" (ha!)light...I do feel it's best for my bio son to grow up with a brother or sister but I am struggling. I'm also feeling uncomfortable as I imagine the years ahead having to explain adoption to my second child and help him/her find his/her identity.
Help! My heart is in a tangle!
Originally Posted By To Melanie
Even when your pregnant with your second child, you ask yourself, "How can I love this next baby as much as I love my first child?" A lot of women do that. It's so interesting to see howfast we love a new baby. I have four biological children now and feel that I could love an adopted child easily. We don't love our children equally, we love them independent of one another and we love them together...even if love can't be measured, we know "how much" we love our children...
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Originally Posted By vicki
I have both bio an adopted children. There is 15 years between our 2 youngest daughters. I wondered too not really knowing what we were facing. Our adoption just "feel into our lives", maybe not the right choice of words but that is what happened. We were not looking to adopt it just happened. I can tell you that I love this baby with all my heart and so does my husband and older children. When I was pregnant for the second time I though the same...how could I ever love another baby as much as my first. It just comes and you will. It's not like trying to do something it just is there.
Originally Posted By Melanie
Thank you for your kind response. I especially appreciate your description of how we love our children. God Bless you.