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Hello all! I'll give you a little back story. I've had my fs for 9 months now. We got him when he was 3 months old. I can't believe he's 1 it went by too fast. Back to what the point is. He tested positive for meth. and ** said she used pot and smoked. He was stiff as a board and jerked a lot when we fisrt got him. He had always been full of smiles, very curious, and hit all the milestones right on time. He's on the small side beside that he seems for the most part like a normal 1 year old when I'm not around other 1 year olds. My niece is the same age(3 days younger) and for the most part them seem to be the same.
My worry is that he can go to just about anyone after a couple minutes. My husband or I leave the room and as long as someone is in there with him he's fine. Yes there are times when he wants to be with us and he crys because we didn't let him come with us but for the most part he's cool with it. My niece crys if her Mom or Dad are not in the room. When a stranger comes in the house he's usually fine within a couple minutes. We are getting close to being able to adopt him and I am just worried that He may not have that strong a bond with us yet. Could it be he's just a friendly baby? All of my friends kids cry if they don't see their parents. Both of my fboys are good with anyone. I am probably worring about nothing. I just want to catch it early and help him if it might turn out to be a problem.
My Mom said my sister and I were the same way. Not that it would have anything to do with him but some kids can be that way right?? None of my friends kids but some.
Any input would be welcomed.
Thanks for reading
I often tell moms to trust their insticts. It seems to me you're sensing an issue. If your concerned, there are things you can do to help aid attachment. For starters, don't let anyone hold him except immediate family. Do lots of little things to encourage him to look at you-like peek-a-boo games. Hold him while you feed him. Use a front facing baby carrier and hold him a lot.
Some kids are friendlier then others. But because you know his early history includes drugs and loss and you feel there is a difference, it makes since to do what encourages attachment. Hope that helps some.
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Thank you for your response. And for not telling me not to worry about it. I know he isn't having major issues I just want to make sure i'm doing everything I can to ensure he is ok.
Thank you again
Attachment work with a little one is so much easier then if the issue goes on to an older age... I agree with LUCY if your gut is telling you this feels wrong then it might be time to check into Attachment and the things that you can do to help the child.
Thinking and learning about attachment and using some of the methods to help a child cannot hurt!
We noticed attachment issues in our son when he was about 1 and a 1/2 The big thing that sticks out in my head was when we had a family gathering and my son got a boo-boo and came running toward me---but stopped for aunt Jayne because she was closer and let aunt Jayne do the boo-boo kiss....No one else in the room saw this as odd, but I personally felt it was and knew that he should have run past all the other mothers in the room for me!
We were able to investigate attachment and focus on the toddler issues and found many ideas and activities to help him... and I am now very confident that his attachment is secure and healthy.... Mom's do know the best and if it feels off--it cannot hurt to work on it...