How about a roll call

I JUST found this area tonight. I've been "burning up the wires" the last few weeks trying to wrap my head around adopting as a single parent. Of course I always thought I'd meet Mr. Right and have children... but it didn't go that way. Somewhere around the late thirties I gave that up. So, I decided to foster, and loved it, but REALLY didn't intend to adopt... until the little guy left after ten months with me to go to a sibling placement. I called his caseworker the next day (after I stopped crying) to tell him that 1) I certainly wanted this to work for him but 2)they better not send him anywhere else but right back here if it didn't. And, six months later, here he is. He's four, collects sticks, life goal is to drive a train... and I wouldn't change a thing. Then, the panic set in. College fund, life insurance, guardian (just in case), insurance, fishing, camping, what about his older brother?, adolescence, dating, social skills... I'm paralyzed by worry (except for the day to day stuff... that seems relatively easy at this point). Hopefully this is just a phase. I need to mention, too, that my friends and family are the greatest... totally supportive and not at all surprised when I said I was going to adopt him. I think they saw it coming even before I did. jan :hippie:

Hi! I'm Siobhan - 38, single and living in TX for the past 1 1/2 years. I, like many others, figured I'd grow up, get married, have kids and do some fostering like my parents did. At 36 I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease - great disease to get as it is fully controllable with meds, but it forced me to reevaluate. I realized that my 'dream man' wasn't going to simply appear, and that if I wanted a family I would need to make my own moves. I was licensed as a foster-foster/adopt home last month and took my first placement of 2yo M two days ago. Whew! While I have had a lot of contact with my niece and nephew, I am learning A LOT about parenting FAST LOL! With three dogs and an active 2yo I'm already running.....but, I must say, having a BALL!:love: I love this site, and appreciate the opportunity to 'pick the brains' of those with parenting experience. Funny side note - I spoke to my fs's mom on the phone yesterday and asked her what she would like him to call me. I was floored when she suggested Nana (this was what I called my GRANDMOTHER!!) then mortified when I realized that, based on her age when she had him (16) I was OLD enough to be his Grandma. Gulp! Good luck to you all!

Welcome to all the new voices (Chad, Jan, Siobhan) on this thread. It is so great to have a place to post to about being a single adoptive parent and to build relationships with other parents. We all seem to have similar experiences yet also there are challenges and joys that are unique to our situations. Here is a question for all of you single parents. Do you have other places like this where you can connect and discuss these things with other parents? In the office where I work there are many women who have had multiple children so we talk about all of the developmental stages (potty training, first day at school, dating, etc.). They are all married though so there are times that I feel uncomfortable and I know they are looking at me like I'm crazy. A few weeks ago we accepted the placement of another child and I definitely got some looks and wondering glances. When I told my coworker that I wanted to adopt again in the future she asked me if I was going to wait until after I got married. I said "Oh, I'm not planning on ever getting married." That stopped her in her tracks. I'm just glad that at least I have this place to vent, discuss, and share. Tina

The threads here on "singles" are so encouraging! It's so unusual to hear other people saying the same things I say about wanting to adopt regardless of bio kids, expecting I'd eventually meet "Mr. Right" but haven't (yet?), deciding that he would have to want to adopt to be with me anyway, dealing with questions from people, wanting so badly to help a few of the many children in desparate need, etc. Thank you for making me feel less alone and "odd woman out" in my feelings and endeavors. I turned 31 a week ago and have wanted to adopt since I was a child, and planned on international adoption for about 10 years. I have prayed about it at length and am waiting on God's timing and my financial security:). It's a challenge to have paid off college loans, car loans, etc. (done) and have saved a good amount of money by yourself. Now, I'm going to grad. school to get a higher paying, more enjoyable, safer, and less stressful job. Next up is to buy a home in a "country" neighborhood where my future children can play in a big yard:). So, I know it'll still be a few years, but I'm definitely "in." Best wishes to all of you and your families...and keep up the good work!:laundry: :drive: :coffee: :love:

HI another single parent here. I am almost 42 - it is true that after 40 you forget how old you are. I have two boys - oldest home for 3 years now and youngest for 9 months. Already looking for the next one to bring home. Another boy - most likely but who knows. Both of my boys are from Texas. That is not the state that I live in. I dealt with alot of bias in my state regarding single parents. Love working with Texas though. Hope to go back again someday. We are a transracial family - youngest is AA. And as he puts it "the dogs are black like me." We have two of them - all of us live in 900 square feet. Needless to say I am looking to upgrade to at least 1000 square feet or more. Scandi

I am a 39 yr old single mom from MN. My boys (ages 2 and 5) have been with me about 6 months now and it is going great! I am hoping to have everything finalized this summer.

...like my list of sons! :coffee: It is so cool to read about how everyone is doing. I do not check this board or post here as much as I should. I am usually at: [url]http://forums.adoption.com/special-needs-adoption/[/url] That is where the parents with children with special needs post. If I posted things here about what is going on...I think it would scare some people! :evilgrin: That board also has a bi-weekly chat that meets on Tuesday and Fridays. Lots of things are spoken about, even about adoption and kid issues! I wish all of you the best in your journey.

Hi gang. I'm a 37 year old single man. Most men my age are married and have families of their own. This hasn't happened for me, as I've been left at the train station it seems. Over the years I've lost the motivation to find someone to settle down with and raise a family. I once saw a father playing catch with his son, and I became saddened that I may never have that experience in my lifetime. I don't want to be robbed of being a father, so I've been contemplating adoption for the near future. Hearing your stories are very touching and inspiring. There are so many kids in foster care waiting for families. I hope I can help make difference and adopt kids one of these days. I'm glad I found this forum!

Hi, I'm a 38 y.o. single adoptive mom. Norah came home at 3 wks and today she is a whole 2 months old! I was thinking of throwing her a quick birthday party... j/k. Norah was placed through a private agency, I'm hoping to add a little sister to the family in a few years... or maybe brother.

Hi, I'm a forty two year old AA single adoptive mom. The adoption of my 7 month old daughter was recently finalized. This is my first adoption (first child as well) but I certainly don't plan for it to be my last!

I am finalizing my letter and getting ready to ship it to my agency. Home study and paperwork are all complete. I'm so nervous that I will never be chosen! I've really enjoyed reading all the posts of singles who have adopted.

Hello, all. I'm new here, just found this place, and am relieved to see all the other single parents around (even if this thread is old and almost dead). I am just starting the adoption process and will be adopting my sister's 3 children almost as soon as her parental rights are terminated. 2 of the babies (girls, age 1) have already been removed from her and placed with my parents as a temporary measure. Then third is due at Christmas. Six months ago it looked like this adoption was never going to happen, or if it did, it wouldn't be for years. So I moved forward with my life and moved to England. Two days ago I got the email that is now changing my life: rights will be terminated within the month. Decision time! Reactions from friends and family are decidedly mixed. Some say I can't do it, some say I don't want to do it, some say I should do it, some say I'd even be good at it! (Being a single parent to three girls under 16 months) All I know is that I'm GOING to do it...and I am scared out of my mind about exactly what this means. I mean, I don't even know what the process is for a kinship adoption! And doing it on my own...?

Hello, I'm happy that there are people out there like me. I'm 32 year old woman. We'll I've recently decided to move forward and start gathering information for adoption. I wasnt' able to have children in my twenties when I was married. And I've always wanted to have 5 children, right now I would settle for just one. I will admit that I'm terrified of being a sinle parent. So I'm glad that there are people out there who have had similar experiences, and that I found this site. :thanks:

Welcome Yadira, I am a 28 y/o single mom of 2 toddlers that I adopted from foster care in Nov. 2007 after being their foster parent. Good luck on your journey..These boards rock!!!

Hi, Hi! I am currently pursuing adoption as a single parent. I am 38 years old and while I had hoped to meet my husband by now, I haven't and really want to have a family of my own. I am a special education teacher and love children very much. Children with special needs hold a treasured place in my heart as do children in the foster care system. However, I long for a baby. I am therefore pursuing domestic adoption through foster care although I am considering domestic newborn - I worry about this as a single parent because no one may pick me. And while I would like to use my skills and passion for children with disabilities, I also know that I would need a lot of support to do that. This is a difficult and confusing process and I am just getting started. I attended two orientations, one with an agency placing domestic newborns, and one with an agency working with kids in foster care or with special needs (AASK). I have an intake interview with AASK on Monday, but I'm still worrying about choosing the right agency and avenue. I have limited finances but am committed to this wholeheartedly! But there are still a lot of decisions to make and other agencies to consider. I like what I have read about facilitators, but have not found any in my area yet. I recently moved to a new place (Arizona) so my networking is limited. I am very hopeful that these message boards will be helpful with all the questions and concerns I am facing. Thanks, Jeni!