How Could a Sex Offender Adopt a Child!?

This really makes me angry. When I went through the process of becoming a foster parent, I would have failed if I had a prior conviction of child abuse. It was that cut and dried. The screening was quite intense. I didn't feel at all that it was a "rubber stamping" procedure. How this ever happened is totally beyond me. It is unacceptable. I can only imagine the worry this brings to birthparents. I know its not much assurance, but rest assured that the vast majority of us adoptive parents love your children totally.

I am FUUUUURIOUS! When my husband and I started the adoption process not only were we finger printed an entire background check was done that included medical, financial and criminal background checks. Our home was inspected for guns, firearms and anything that could be harmful to a child. Our entire home was inspected including closets, the attic and under the beds. Our family members went through the same. We have to have fire extinguishers on all floors of our home including the garage and 5 of our closest friends were interviewed extensively as were our family doctors. We also had to list every single place where we had ever lived so that all of that those places could be checked as well. I am appalled that SOMEONE LIKE A PEDIFILE could be allowed to foster/adopt. Who ever approved this adoption needs to loose their job and face criminal charges for child endangerment. They definately dropped the ball. Ladies I understand your fears and anxiety I would be upset if I were in your shoes. I really hope that this is an isolated incident. As an adoptive mom from Texas I know that TEXAS is very strict and follows the law to the letter. You will drive yourself crazy if you start thinking about the what ifsӔ. You made a decision to place please trust yourself and trust the process. We love our daughter unconditionally and would put our lives on the line to keep her safe. I would bet your child(s) family would do the same. Thanks for sharing this info perhaps we need to write to President Bush or our Senators so that they stay on top of this situation. Regulating Adoption laws with severe consequences Nationwide could stop this from happening again. Hugs, Maria

Considering that NY state law prohibits such a thing, the adoption should be nullified IMO. What would cause greater trauma, changing families or being sexually abused? Horrible that such a thing occurred. Someone didn't follow procedure. I do know that sometimes the checks are not thorough so that the adoption can proceed. Alas, my daughters aparents' atty tried to rush them into court w/o a homestudy (then they were upset to learn they had to pay for it and such). Too bad I'd signed the relinquishment form by then. Do you think they were thoroughly checked out? Doubt it. That makes me sick. This story makes me sick... Trusting the system has its risks. No wonder the trust we have is so little. Maia

This is a case where certainly the adoption should be nullified! How terrible. Surely someone made a huge mistake this time!

To piggyback Davids post҅should convicted sex offenders (rapists/pedophiles) have parental rights at all? The fact that they are foster/adopt parents doesnt make it any more egregious to me than it does when the court allows a convicted sex offender to have continued unsupervised visits with a biological child. Many states have laws in place (my state is one of them) that says that convicted sex offenders cant be prohibited from seeing their kids.

I know that this thread has already closed... however I am married to an RSO, and he is not a "Rapist" or a "Pedophile." My husband is the most wonderful and caring father in the world... You do not know that mans situation so you cannot truly say that he has no right to have parental rights... As an Example my Husband made a poor decision online when he was younger and was lied to by a 16 year old girl. he was 19-20 and he met up with her... nothing happened and because she had sent photos to him he was convicted of being in possession of child pornography... so honestly y'all at the most judgmental group of people i have ever met. Our son loves his father, and every day Preston (our son) tells his dad "I love you Daddy" and you can see all the love in the world in my husbands eyes. the media and society had taught us that people who make sexual actions should be discriminated against... and you know what... people made a mistake... and if you look at the statistics RSO's never recommit their crimes... Also as an Adoptee... i wouldn't have cared if my father or mother had that title if i trusted them. also we are adopting because the court says that my husband is no threat.. GROW UP AND REALIZE NOT EVERYONE IS BAD WITH THAT LABEL!

2007kodiak, I understand the point you're making. Each situation should be treated differently. For example your husband didn't know the true age of the girl so he shouldn't be thought off badly. There are probably plenty of other men who have been in similar situations simply because the didn't know the true age of a girl. Many years ago a relative of mine had a boyfriend who was 24 and she was 15. He didn't know how young she was when they first courted but even so he was a good man who treated her like a princess. It didn't stop some people being really nasty towards him and accusing him of all sorts including being a pedophile. In the end they split because of a few small minded people who should have known better. Unfortunately people are only human and it's just a case of educating the small minded ones. People are quick to judge though when articles like this one are printed [url=http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1522158/Gay-couple-jailed-for-abusing-their-foster-children.html]Gay couple jailed for abusing their foster children - Telegraph[/url]

Many years ago a relative of mine had a boyfriend who was 24 and she was 15. He didn't know how young she was when they first courted but even so he was a good man who treated her like a princess. It didn't stop some people being really nasty towards him and accusing him of all sorts including being a pedophile. In the end they split because of a few small minded people who should have known better. I'm not trying to be offensive but I can't not respond to this---a 24 year old dating a 15 year old is not right in any way shape or form. It is illegal in my state as it is in most others I assume. It is possible that this person did not realize the girl was only 15 because people do lie about their ages but to continue dating someone who is a minor when you are well past the age of adulthood after you are aware of their true age is not acceptable or appropriate.

I don't live in the US so the laws there aren't relevant to the laws where I live. They weren't having sex so he wasn't doing anything wrong. If they were having sex it would have been illegal as she was under 16 and he could have been prosecuted. Of course he found out her real age as she never actually lied to him nor did they tell each other how old they were straight away. It is also judgmental, just because a 15 or 16 year old has a boyfriend 9 years older than them doesn't make it wrong. I had a school friend who was 16 who started seeing her boyfriend when he was 30. It's now 35 years on and they are still happily married. I also have a relative who is 22 years younger than her husband and they have been married for 32 years. I know it's not the norm but on the other hand why be judgmental just because you don't approve.

If the 15 year old were an adult and the boyfriend was 9 years older than her then I would agree that it was no big deal. They are both adults they can do as they wish. That was not the case in the situation you described. Where does one draw the line? I stand by what I said- a 24 year old dating a 15 year old is not appropriate or acceptable.

You have a right to your opinion but as you don't know them, you don't know what their relationship was like (they didn't have sex), you don't know how mature she was, you have no right to judge. If they were having sex I would have agreed with you and your point about where to draw the line. They didn't cross that line because he respected her. If he hadn't he might have broken the law. I know the people involved, I know what happened, neither of them did anything wrong so back off. When you know these two people you will have a right to judge.

It's true this could be a case of a male not knowing the girl's age. But the question remains is how he was approved to be a foster parent. I, along with family members I lived with were all fingerprinted. I also had to list all the addresses I lived in for 20 years. I also want to say that the bio dad of my 2 older ones was found guilty of SA and there's an order of protection from all the kids, until they were 18.

People are under the misconception that employees of agencies are diligent at all times. The field is full of human beings some who are committed and some who couldn't care less. They are simply trying to clear their caseloads. Children are not objects but they are sometimes looked upon as "problems" and in order to alleviate the pressure people make rash decisions and mistakes. There are also many predators lurking. I am not sure how the situation can be made better but blaming the courts, agencies and pointing fingers at people who are "paid" to look after human beings isn't going to solve the problem. These are matters of the heart. I am not sure what can be done short of installing cameras and watching everyone like a hawk. Check out the information about Cornwall, Ontario and the vast amount of predatory behaviour that happened over decades all under the watchful eyes of numerous police, courts and agencies against children who were in care and custody. Project Truth. There was a police officer who tried to expose it all back when it was happening and he was run out of the area. He was also place in jail when he refused to participate in an inquiry after the fact because he was outraged that nothing was done when it was all going down. It's enough to make your hair curl.

Hi, I just want to say I agree with Kodak 100%. I used to be one of those people who looked at sex offenders as people who were perverted and looking to fondle anything with a heartbeat. That all changed until this past year when one of my best friends was arrested and charged with child porn at the age of 19. The reason being is that he worked at an after school program where he teached young people 25 and under how to play percussion for a marching band. Let me also point out that other younger high school students 16 and over teach there. He met a student that was two years younger than him and they both clicked on the spot and started dating. They started are real intimate relationship which included sexting. What happened was that his boyfriend haven't came out to his parents at the time and not to mention that the mother is a single mother and anti-gay. She caught both of them kissing when she got home and then she saw the pics they were sending. She reported it to the police and he was charged not only because it was someone under the age of 18 but he so called had authority over him even though if you were really there. You'd see how unfair this was, they were both in compliant with the age of consent law and he really didn't have any authority over him.Nonetheless, he's now charged with child porn which in the state of PA is now categorized as Sexual Abuse Of Children but to the lowest extent, he's facing up to 4 years in prison and now he has to register as a sex offender.I'm not saying to not be careful if a registered sex offender wants to adopt but this process needs to be looked at really carefully, because my friend is great with kids, kids love him, and he would never hurt a child. But now that this happened, the mother realized how unfair this was and now regrets reacting in the way she did. They still plan on seeing each other when he gets out but now they're scared because they always talked about raising a family together but now there's avery limited chance that might happen. Hopefully we can find a loop hole around this.Yes it's okay to be careful. If you see a potential parent who is a RSO, investigate, ask questions, monitor what they are doing, look more into what happened. However, we live in a society in where we're trained to not give people the same benefit of the doubt just because they got caught up in an unfair justice system and I hope one day people realizethat just because society puts a name on somebody, doesn't mean that they are who the government says they are.

People, settle down. Listen to these facts. I know it may seem horrible that a sex offender was allowed to adopt. The stereotypes all sex offenders is a blanket. I personally do not believe that ALL sex offenders need to be barred for life from enjoying a family, or adopting a child. I do believe that much tighter scrutiny must be used before an offender can even remotely be considered. Not all sex offenders are the same, and not all sex offenses are the same. But we as a society have given all sex offenders and all sex offenses a blanket label as "horrible people who deserve nothing but death" This is wrong. People can reform, even sex offenders. The recidivism rates are much lower for these offenders than any other type of criminal activity. Incarcerated offenders go through extensive treatment programs prior to their release which only lowers these rates even more. Not only this but they suffer harsh ridicule, torture and abuse of their own while incarcerated by other inmates and guards. So much so, that the desire to continue types of offenses become less desirable, for fear of going back to prison to suffer more torture and abuse by their fellow inmates and peers. Most offenders, choose to change their lives for the better, take advantage of the programs offered while incarcerated to better and more productive citizens. Most are genuinely remorseful for what they did, and when they get released spend the rest of their lives trying to prove to society they have changed for the better. They are not machines that are pre-programmed. They too, like us are human beings. They are not "monsters". Most offenders families turn their backs on these people for one reason or another. This makes the release offender feel isolated, lonely, and in a constant state of depression. "No one loves them, and they have no one to love." This loneliness, this isolation increases the chances of criminal activity. I propose, instead of a blanket label on these individuals, we look at them case-by-case. Not exclusively as what they did in the past, but what they have done to make amends, their path to reformation. What they are doing today. Who they are as people today. Because we all know people can change, even convicted sex offenders. I have seen this with my own eyes. I could not believe it possible, until it was repeatedly demonstrated to me over a period of several years. I had a friend who married a convicted sex offender, who had a child by him, 25 years later, that child is grown up, and under multiple polygraphs the now adult reported no accounts of abuse by her adoptive father ever in her life. Nothing but pure love like a father should give their child came from this convicted sex offender. He never abused her, never had the thought to. He completed several institution and community based rehabilitative programs and completely turned his life around for the better. He has never displayed any indication he was still into what it was when he committed his crime. It is as if the person who did the crime, died, and a new man took his body. In a what, metaphorically speaking, exactly that is what happened. No people, I do not think that we should just had out a Golden Ticket to allow all offenders to adopt a child, but I do think that this "blanket label" and "blanket procedure needs to be lifted. Much tighter scrutiny needs to be utilized when a sex offender petitions to become an adoptive parent. I believe a level of supervision needs to be set in place if an offender is approved, and that what the offender has done with their lives during and after release, and show a degree of proof that they can be a safe parent. I feel that a reformation of our laws, no longer labeling all sex offenders under one blanket label, but rather looking at them case-by-case, and change our views and understanding of how the minds of sex offenders work. But I definitely agree with you, that under the current circumstances, this person should not have been able to adopt a child. However, had my proposal been utilized, and the offender demonstrated and an outstanding level of evidentiary proof that he was safe to become a parent, and only after full rehabilitation was proven, I would not see a reason do deny him a child, because I would know with confidence that that child will be safe.