Health Issues

I don't think you should worry about it too much. Even if you had a husband, what if you were both in an accident and your child lost you both? The child would still have to live with family. I mean, I think it's a common and normal fear for a single parent but he could still be orphaned if you were married. I'm a single parent and have health issues. When I begin to worry, I just put it all in God's hands. I trust that he will make happen what is meant to happen. I don't know if you have faith in God but if you do, that is what helped me. Having a will made out is also something that should be done to calm your nerves and know that your child will be where you wanted him to be. Make sure everything is in place so you won't have to worry about much on that end. But otherwise, I say don't worry. It's not something you can control anyway. And if you can't control it, worrying is not going to do you a bit of good. That is what I tell myself about getting sick again. (I had a kidney transplant.) Only worry about the things you can change! :)

I agree with Bethany. It's not something you can control, so worrying about it won't get us anywhere. What you can do is make sure that the things you can control are in order... Make out a will, with explicit instructions on what's to happen to your son if anything happens to you. Also, have a look at risk management insurance - not just life insurance, but insurance for if something happens to you and you can't work, or need to move for medical reasons, etc. A financial planner should be able to help you out there. I haven't adopted yet, but I've started the process. (I'm in Australia), and I'm this week setting up my life insurance and risk management plan. That way, once I adopt, it will be a simple matter of changing the beneficiary and adjusting my will. Rebecca

I think that your worries are natural. The thought of my daughter being orphaned twice is overwhelming. But, the others are right - you can't live like that. I got a will, guardianship papers, living will etc. It does help with your peace of mind that you have left everything clear and that your child will always know that you set everything up for them should something happen in an untimely manner. I look at other issues too. I want to make sure that I obtain Long Term Care Insurance and prepay for my funeral. As an only child, I don't want her overwhelmed by that kind of stuff, even as an adult. I guess you always worry and want to make life as easy as possible for your baby. You are not alone.

Thanks for your replys and I agree with you all, I know not to worry about things you can not control. I have a will, I have life insurance, disability insurance, etc. It just sometimes creeps into my mind when I look at my son and think no one will love him like I love him. I am not crazy, and yes I have faith in GOD so that is who I trust. I think since I lost my father at such a young age, (age 12) I just think about these things from time to time, I do not dwell on it. I just thought I would see if other single parents have the same thoughts at times, and if they handle them differently. I think I will feel better about it once my son gets a little bit older, he is only 2 and 1/2. But again I do not dwell on it and I do not let it affect my everyday life. Just curious, thanks again for the responses.

i am like you, i don't dwell on it but i do think about it from time to time. my family lives 45min to an hour away so if something happened to me, he would not only loose me, but also his community and friends. like you i think no one could take care of him like i do, but i think any parent feels that way. i can see how it might be on your mind a little more than others having lost your dad at such a young age. i think you have made all the provisions you can and it sounds like you are doing all the right things. how is your little one??? and adoption number two, are you still waiting to be matched?

Its a thought we all have. My first business trip i took after adopting, I was freaked that my will wasn't finished. What if, What if, What if??? You caould just make yourself nuts thinking about this. Beside preparing financially, you need to have to prepare her for her guardian - I don't mean talking about what could happen, but have her familiar with the guardian of your choice so she isn't given away to a stranger again.