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I never considered the possibility of having another life inside me until someone else brought it up. I had noticed that i had gained some wieght and things like that but i didnt really think anything of it cuz i dont have a job and i am graduated from high school and still looking at what college i want to to go to. i figured my lack of activity was the reason for my wieght gain. then, someone came up to my bf and asked him if i was pregnant cuz it looked like i was "showing." when my bf came to me with this information and asked me if there was a possibility that i was pregnant i immediately disregarded the idea. i just didnt think it was possible. i always thought if i was pregnant that i would just know, that i would see the signs. later that night though, i started really thinking about it, all my changes in behavior and the changes with my body, and then it hit me. "could i really be pregnant and not know it?" at that point i got quite scared. i am going to be taking a pregnancy test this week to find out for sure, but i am still worried and scared like no other. i have never had a scare like this before. i am only nineteen and this is not how i wasnted to bring a child into this world. my bf wants me to keep the child if i am pregnant but that thought really scares me cuz we really cant afford a child. we are still living at his parent's house. that is no life for a child, but then at the same time i cant bear the thought of actually giving birth to something that me and my bf created and then having to give it away. i just dont know what to do and i dont know the best ways to explore my options. i just need a nudge in the right direction. i need some help!
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First off, Take the test. If you are pregnant, you need to be taking extra special care of yourself - and that means taking vitamins and seeing a doctor.
Secondly, you need some options counselling. Options counselling is NOT adoption counselling. Its someone helping you figure out what resources are available to you to parent, what resources are available to you if you choose not to parent, and what your options are. There is LOTS of help available to you if you want to parent ... so keep that in mind.
Secondly, in these situations, sometimes forum members get private messages from people who wish to "offer help" or adopt the baby. PLEASE BE ADVISED THAT THIS IS AGAINST THE RULES.
Community Websites are NOT places for adoptive parents or adoption professionals to solicit birthparents. So many people visit the Community Websites that birthmothers get "pounced on" from dozens of different people if this rule is not strictly observed. Adoption Media is committed to making the Community Websites places where birthparents feel safe. It is not appropriate for adoption professionals or hopeful parents to post "I can help" messages, or Internet addresses for birthmothers to visit, or to send this type of e-mail to birthmothers.
Conversely, it is not appropriate for birthparents to use the Community Websites to solicit adoptive parents. Are you pregnant and considering adoption? For your safety, we strongly recommend that you do not select adoptive parents or an adoption professional from the Community Websites. We have no way of know which parents on the message boards or other community services are qualified to adopt, and which professionals are reputable. Visit [url]www.ParentProfiles.com[/url] to find information on hundreds of hopeful adoptive parents who have each met the pre-adoption requirements in their state. Visit [url]www.AdoptionDirectory.com[/url] to find an adoption attorney, agency or other adoption professional.
If you get any private messages that solicit your baby, please forward them to me or Kiwi, Brandy Hagz or Crick.
Thanks :)
Jen
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thank you so much for replying. i feel like i have been counting the minutes since i made this post just waiting for somebody to reply. i just feel like i dont know what to do. i am pretty sure i am pregnant. it is wierd, it is almost like i "feel" the child there even though i am not the big yet. i keep almost praying that the test will show up negative and i wont be pregnant and i wont have to deal with it but then at the same time i see all these little kids and i think what it would be like to have. to have it's little glowing eyes look at me and smile. well, once again, thank you so much for replying. i really appreciate any help i can get.
Kitty -- look up crisis pregnancy centers or clinics in your area. They will provide you with a test for free (take advantage of it) and also some vitamins etc. If anyone tries to pressure you into anything -- WALK THE OTHER WAY.
But first things first, you need to find out if you are pregnant. :)
Jen
Hi Kitty,
Like Jenn said the only way to really know is to take a Pregnancy test.
Places like Walmart and Walgreens or Pharmacies carry a variety of Pregnancy Tests. If money is a factor check with Planned Parenthood I am pretty sure the test is free if not it will be very inexpensive. Planned Parenthood may also be able to help you with some resources such as the Options Counseling that Jenn mentioned.
Once you know that you are pregnant then you will be able to think a little clearer. Perhaps then you can sit down with your boyfriend and start looking at options together. If you are pregnant there is a lot to think about at least you will know one way or the other.
This board is a great source. There are people who chose to place their babies in loving homes through adoption and there are people who chose to parent. Both choices have pros and cons.
I agree with Jenn if anyone tries to pressure you into anything WALK AWAY. This is YOUR life and these are your choices to make.
Take care and know that you are NOT ALONE
Hugs,
Maria
thank you so much to both of you for your advice. as much as my bf wants to keep the baby i believe that if i am pregnant that the best option would be adoption. the part about that that scares me the most though is the actual thought of giving my child up. i cant bear the thought of saying goodbye to that child, but i know i cant give it the life it deserves. i am still a child myself and still trying to grow up. once again, thank you all so much for your advice and once i know for sure i am sure i will be coming to this site for A LOT more advice.
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