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For years, we've been trying.
For years, we've talked about names.
For years, we've disagreed on the type of name we want.
He wants something popular - something trendy - he likes "Emily".
I like "Emily" - just not for our child.
He is stuck on it - he REFUSES to budge.
We were able to pick a boy/male name - one we like a lot - and I think he found it so darn easy, because he refuses to believe we will have a boy...LOL
How do you find a middle ground? I am ok with Emily as one of two middle names - he wants it as a first name.
I fear, any child we have (should we have one) or any child we adopt (should we adopt) will come home as "Baby Girl/Boy Hagz"
How can we work together? Anyone have any advice!?
If there was a name that neither of us would budge on (I love it/you hate it), we put it the middle name list. Any that we both liked went on the first name list. It's been updated a lot in the last ten years.
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We had no problems with a boy's name. When we were trying to adopt a Kaz baby we had a referral, so we knew he was a boy. When that didn't work out, we were crushed, but eventually decided to keep the boy's name we picked out....my father and dh's had the same name, my dh's name, my mother's father's name. Much to our surprise, when the domestic agency we were working with called they congratulated us with a newborn baby girl. GIRL????? We didn't exactly have a girl's name. So, it was a 12 hour drive. Good thing! We eventually decided to use family names. Big problem. Dh's mother's name was Japanese and difficult to pronounce. The shortened version was pronounced "Gay". Nice name in a different era. We thought it might be a little tough on the playground, even though dd may very well be gay when she gets older. My mother hates her name, so that was out. Both of my grandmas were German. One had the name Wilhelmina Josephina and the other one was Katerina Josephina. We could go with that Americanized to Katherine. Dh's grandmother was Japanese and had an equally difficult name. Fortunately, his other Grandma had a name we were happy with.
Names are really hard. Good luck with your DH.
Brandy, my take is that refusing to budge on any issue is a surefire way to mess up a marriage. Seriously. I'm not saying he's trying to sabotage things, but why is he digging his heels in on this issue? After all it seems you've been through? Hmm.
Oh Brandy, I've been there.
Clint named Tara when I was asleep right after delivery. I didn't hate the name...it just wasn't MY first pick.
He didn't get much of a say with Shaylea...He didn't hate the name...it just wasn't HIS first pick. He wanted Jenny (guess he shoulda went with that the first time :D)
LOL! this is why dd was "baby girl" for a week. we tried for months. I had a great list of names, he hated most of them. but since dd got his last name, I got to pick the middle names. since i'm the control freak in the family, it was about getting him to come around to my fav name.
I like the idea of a list of common names. Find one that he likes that you can stomach (or vice versa). or have baby girl/baby boy remain so til everyone screams "Does s/he have a name yet?????". that will force someone's hand :) .
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this is one area where I let dh's vote have more weight then mine, because there are so many things I decide - I"m a little on the bossy side :) but I figured since he had really strong opinions, to let him have his way...I don't hate either name - h's is a little trendy for me, but it's still old fashioned so it works.
How's about Amelie, like the movie?
The way I see it, if you can't stomach the idea of calling for Emily from the front porch of the house, then you should tell him that. I can't imagine that he would still stick to his guns if he knew that calling Emily, or whatever, from the porch turns your stomach, I mean no one wants that negative of an emotion associated with their child's name.
Emily was a goat in a story book I had when I was 3 or 4 years old. Wish I could remember the name of the book... tell him there is no way you can name your daughter after a goat. Sheesh. :)
If you figure out the answer to this can you please let me know? We've just started the adoption process and didn't have a problem picking out a boys name, but we're constantly arguing over a girls name. He's stuck on a name that I really love, but it's very close to my nieces name and my sister is having trouble with us choosing it, so I'm trying to come up with other options and he won't have it. UGH!
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both write out 5 names you both like, put them in a hat and draw a name out, use which ever name is pulled. Do the same for middle names. Wish you luck.
FH-Lorraine123
Why is it that boy's names are so easy, but when it comes to girl names.......
We are the exact opposite!!! We easily agreed on a girl's name, but after 5 years we have only managed to agree on one boy's name and we used that name on the little guy we had briefly.
Now that we are thinking about trying for #2 late this year, we can't agree on either, LOL.
FH-Lorraine123
Why is it that boy's names are so easy, but when it comes to girl names.......
We're in so much trouble if we EVER have a girl.
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Oh my gosh- we are having the same problem. I swear my husband disagrees just to be a pain- not because he cares all that much! Well- I am the QUEEN of compromise, this is what we are doing- I come up w/ 3 names, DH comes up w/ 3 names, I get to take 1 off his list, he takes 1 off mine, Our daughter gets to take a name off of our combined list. That leaves us w/3. When we get our refferl we will see what fits. Hopefully at that point we will agree. Problem is we both tend to be a little stubborn.
Hey Brandy... My name is Emily. My parents named me lonnng before before the name was popular. Now it's the most popular name in the country.
I'm not necessarily saying that there is anything wrong with my name - I mean, it's my name. But it's a bit confusing because there are so many of us out there now... In elementary school I had one other Emily. By high school I knew five. Trust me, it's alot more now. Emilys and Emmas abound... I can see Emily as a middle name like FirstName Emily Rose Last Name... That's how you can incorporate it into your kids name if your husband wants it so badly.
Just my 2 cents!