If you were open to any race, how soon were you matched?

Hi, Our agency said expect a 6-18 month wait, that was the average. Exactly 2 months later we had our baby girl in our arms! We were an agency pick placement and weren't called till she was born. I wouldn't change a thing!!!

Forgive my ignorance (always something new to learn) but what is an "agency pick placement"? I thought the pbmoms always chose the families their bchildren went to.

J&D waited ... 9ish months? I forget.

Jaenelle, I think the agency pick placement is for the placements of kids whose pbparents have chosen to have a closed adoption. Our agency does this, too, they honor the expectant parents wishes, so if a couple/woman comes in and says they want a closed adoption, the agency might pick a couple whose been waiting a long time or who they feel may be difficult to place for whatever reason (I'm not sure if this is how an agency picks, just speculating...) But if a woman/couple comes in and says they want to place with a young couple, they're shown profiles of young couples. Or a single mom or dad, they'll be shown profiles of singles, or a religious, sports oriented, etc, etc family and they'll be shown the appropriate profiles. I think some places show all the profiles to the woman/couple, but not sure.

Okay, thanks!

We were involed in an agency pick situation with our very first presentation. In our case, it was between us & another couple. The BMom just could not decide between us so she told the agency to choose. The other couple had been waiting ONLY ONE WEEK longer than us, so the agency picked them. This went on for about a MONTH!! Our Homestudy also wasn't completed yet. Anyway, About 2 weeks later on March 25th we got a call about a baby girl. We met the BMom on March 29th. A few hours after the meeting we got the call she had picked us. Our homestudy had to be hurried! FIVE weeks later we held our daughter in our arms. In mid December of 2001, we had our Homestudy updated & approved. Two weeks later we were matched with a baby boy. On January 9th, 2002 he was born. The day of TPR BMom changed her mind & parented. We took a break after that for a few months. In mid June of 2002 we applied again for placement. Early July we got a call about a baby girl. I first said no, I got scared! A few days later after a long weekend vacation, the attorney had left SEVERAL messages. I called her on a Tuesday, almost a week after the initail call. On Thursday our daughter was born & placed in our arms 1 1/2 days later. In June 2003 we were approved again. I sent in our profiles & told them we didn't want to be shown to any PBMoms unless they were due end of September & on. On August 5th we got a call to be shown for a baby boy due end of September. On August 25th we were chosen. On September 14th our son was born! He was our longest wait from time of profile submitted to his birth. GOOD LUCK!! Deb

Opps, forgot to mention, our first adopted daughter is Biracial, our next daughter is AA & our son is also AA. Deb

In our situation BMom ran into some medical issues before she had chosen adoptive parents. She knew she had to place and asked the agency to pick parents. BMom did however want to meet the parents the agency chose. Today we have a semi-open adoption, and all of us agree on the eventual opening of the adoption :)

The second agency we worked with had a 0 failed matches so it CANnhappen but maybe they meant 0 failed adoptions hwere the baby needed to be returned after being placed. The erason for no failed matches at this particular agency is taht they don't like prebirth matches and STRONGLY encourgae the birth arents to 1) parent 2) find a family member to parent or 3) do fostercare until they are ready to parent. Let's just say they do VERY few adoptions with prebirth matches but when they do those matches stick. lisa

From time of signing until our daughter was born was 6 months. We will finalize in 2 days. What a joy. Everything will happen when it supposed to. We too were open to race. Our beautiful baby is hispanic/caucasion. Good luck.

Thanks, everyone, for your encouragement. We are just waiting for a last couple of documents (health letters from the doctor) before we can send in the homestudy paperwork. I don't expect the doctor's letters before the end of next week as he is out of the office this week. :grr: We should have made the physical appointments sooner in the process, I guess. Oh, well, live and learn. If there's another adoption in our future, maybe then we'll know what to do sooner and what not to worry about. I still expect our homestudy documents to be completed and turned in in a little over a month so I guess that's not too horrible, anyway. Thanks again. It sounds like our 3 to 6 months could be pretty reasonable. I was just trying to give myself kind of a "timeline". I know there are no timelines in adoption, because everything varies, but I am trying not to get my hopes up that it will be too soon.

We signed with our agency in May, matched in October, and DS was born in January. 8 months. Our agency presented us a total of four situations. Our home study was not completed so we couldn't accept either of the first two. For the third situation, we were the second choice, and their first choice accepted the match. Our fourth situation was the charm!DS's birthmom was incredibly positive about the whole situation, and even though she was a teenager and had other so-called "red flags" she knew that adoption was the best choice for her baby. I hope you do have a wonderful experience!Good luck and God bless,Robyn

We were on the waiting list for 4 months when we were placed with our first daughter. It was a 'baby has been born, come pick her up' situation. Total waiting time including paperwork, homestudy etc. was 7 months. With our second adoption we were on the waiting list for 2 months. We were matched and baby boy was born 2 weeks later. Placement fell through after a month and we went back on the waiting list. We matched again 2 months later and our second daughter was born 4 months later. So our second wait, including updating our home study and one failed placement, was 10 months. We were completely open to race all 3 times but did ask to be shown to pbmoms having a girl, the first time around. As it turns out, all 3 placements were caucasian babies. Now we have 2 beautiful daughters. :D simone

We were open to any race but said no to major medical (that was evident at the birth, anyway) We were matched w/a healthy Caucasian/Native American baby within 4 months of our homestudy completion---9 months from the initial agency contact.

Kati, with all due respect, if you're answering "I don't know" when people are raising some serious red flags, you need to know. You know how you keep worrying about failed placements and asking how to avoid them? Knowing your agency is one of the *key* ways to avoid risk.BTW, don't just check adoptive parent references. Check birthparent references. Call from another phone number and claim to be a pregnant woman considering adoption. Claim the birthfather is unknown. Another way to avoid risk is to know how they're treating expectant couples considering adoption. I'll tell you there are a number of large, well respected agencies with excellent reputations among adoptive parents who coerce the hell out of expectant parents considering adoption.Get both sides of the story. Ask questions. When people point stuff like this out, it's your clue to start being very insistent and persistent.