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Today was the day to finalize adoption of my grandson. However, the lawyer phoned early this morning and said there was a "glitch". It seems ** and BF have to be served notice of the hearing 30 days in advance by sheriff's deputies in person. Birthmom was served, but BF was not. Why not? Because he was in jail. Being guarded by the same deputies who serve the summons on their off days. And even though the outside of the envelope clearly said "Name of BF, Cell Block B, County Jail" the deputies could not find him to deliver it!
So, now the judge sets another date (either in October or January) and we pay the deputies to deliver the new notices to Birthmom and BF. And BF will STILL be in jail, even if it is delayed until January! I just hope the deputies can find him this time.:grr:
Is your grandson living with you? HOw old is he?
We pretty much raised our grandaughter, although we have never adopted her.
Hang in there. It will all work out.
big hugs
dmca
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MamaS:
I'm so sorry to hear of this. I don't know of your situation, but I can imagine (from glitches of our own in our adoptions) how irritating this has to be!
If your grandson is living with you-----THANK goodness! At least you have him in your arms, regardless of the mix-ups the system seems to be full of!
Take care and hang in there!
Sincerely,
Linny
I know the feeling all too well. We had to send out 3 times for dna testing. The first notice gave the possible birth father a whole month to go to the lab. We were told there was some kind of mix-up and he did not receive the paper work. The second time the courts gave us a date and if he did not show his rights were going to be terminated. The day before that "most important" dna testing date, once again I receive a phone call-there was a mix up by the court he did not receive the papers. Finally, another dna testing date-this time he shows with proper id which was required and stated in his paperwork he received-once again he was given yet another chance and another date was given. Then he finally took the dna test and was the biological father. And we the hopeful adoptive parents paid for his dna testing. We are still in a contested adoption. Time does not seem to be an issue...which is the saddest part of all!
StacyKelly2
We are still in a contested adoption. Time does not seem to be an issue...which is the saddest part of all!
MamaS - We are in a similar situation where, as quoted by StacyKelly, time does not seem to be an issue. It is hard not knowing if/when the adoption will EVER be finalized - and I'm so sorry yours has experienced another setback.
We are four years into it and have experienced many setbacks - still with no resolution. StacyKelly said it best:
Time does not seem to be an issue...which is the saddest part of all.
It is extremely difficult living day-to-day without knowing and it seems the courts are unconcerned about the strain this placed on the aparents.
I'm so sorry. Hang in there and we'll hang tight with you.
BIG HUGS!
Christie
The judge said that since the fault was in his office we could have an October date (otherwise would have to wait until January) if we can get parents served with new papers by September 4th. Have located birthfather in a residential rehab center but birthmother has been evicted and left no forwarding address. Since this is a holiday weekend it is impossible to locate anyone and get any info.
Yes, we are blessed that we have him with us -- that is the most important thing. But we did want everything legal before he enrolled in school. There will be a change in surname and we hoped to do that before school so that it was not such a "big deal" to redo records, etc. Also so that he can be included in an inheritance that is imminent. Not a lot, but would probably pay for some of his college. Maybe because I am older, I just want to have everything planned and legalized.:D
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Maybe because I am older, I just want to have everything planned and legalized. --MamaS
Naw.....young or old.......because YOU ARE A MOMMA.....you had hoped everything would be planned and legalized! Nothin' wrong with that!!!! (HUG)
Sincerely,
Linny
The date was rescheduled for Oct. 4th and the sheriff's deputies reported that papers were served to both parents but the servers forgot to get either parent to sign a receipt. Both parents state they never saw deputies or received papers. I believe the parents, since the address where they supposedly served the mother is one she was evicted from a week earlier (they had the address on their records and would not have known about the eviction).
So, cancel the October adoption.
My attorney says now that b-mother is homeless and has no fixed address we have to publish it in the official newspaper for three weeks and then we can take proof to the judge that we tried and get another hearing date set. Now I am just hoping for 2006!
(I am also hoping the b-mother is okay. She has never lived on the streets before. Usually she calls every few days, but we haven't talked in a while.)
MamaS.
I am in a similar situation. We were supposed to finalize our adoption on Sept. 8th. Two hours before we were to finalize my lawyer received a check from the BF - nothing else, no note, just a check. The amount was the amount quoted for a paternity test. So, since that check showed up, we could not completely finalize the adoption. We just got the results last week and he is the BF. Now, we get to wait to see if HE decides to fight. The waiting is unbearable and the fact that we can do nothing to make this happen quicker is so frustrating. :grr: Hang in there. My thoughts and prayers are with you!
Jaefer
Paid the lawyer to write the advertisements and the newspaper to print them. One for each birthparent for four consecutive weeks. Birth father is still in rehab and cannot be served by deputies. He also cannot receive phone calls so he can't be told about the hearing. Birth mother is homeless AND has arrest warrant out for being a no-show at probation so she can't be served unless she is caught and if she isn't caught she can't show up at the hearing without being arrested on the spot. So, it looks good for our court date in December IF my lawyer is out of the hospital and back at work by then. He had a mild heart attack last week. What next?
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Thank you for keeping us updated MamaS. I am thinking of you and **hoping** things will be complete for you by the New Year.
Hang in there...