few questions to get some talk

Congratulations on the upcoming adoption!We only go to mass once a week unless it is a holy day.Our parish has the normal CCD, adult CCD and a few others.We don't help out in any of the groups but try to attend activities as they come up to support our parish.Our parish does not offer any structure with adoptions and I haven't checked out any other parishes to date either.

Do you attend mass more than once a week? We go once a week..unless it is a holy day, too. What type of groups does your parish offer? Our parish offers a variety of groups....singles, men's group, women's group, youth group and so on. Do you take part in in any of the groups or activities in your parish or other parishes in your city? We take part in the food drives and other activites that our parish offers. Like this weekend is a carnival. Does your parish or other parishes in your city have any groups for adoptive families? No. --Renee

Do you attend mass more than once a week? No, not now. A few years ago, I had a job with Wednesdays off, and it was great to go to mass in the morning that day. What type of groups does your parish offer? Still getting to know--just moved here. Do you take part in in any of the groups or activities in your parish or other parishes in your city? My husband just started with a group of men at our church that meets Monday mornings, at 6 a.m. (yikes!) It a class, sort of, titled "That Man Is You!" Anyone else heard of it? Does your parish or other parishes in your city have any groups for adoptive families?[/quote] No. I don't know if there are any other families, because when I called to ask about baptism, they called back twice with two different answers, which makes me think they do not have adoptive families oftenk if at all.

We attend mass once aweek. Our parish has womens,mens,minstries moms share group. kids and moms at play, there are quite a few groups I go to the kids, and moms paygroup, Our parish does not havea group for adoptive families. i am now checking other parishes to see if the offer one. our parish had an autumn fest this past saturday. It was really fun. Everything was free. We had hog roast, face painting,bouncey castle, a huge slide, different places for the babies to play and toddler. Hayride, haunted trail,pumkin face painting, giant big screen where they showed Halloween cartoons .

Do you attend mass more than once a week? Usually not unless it is a holy day. My nephew was at a Catholic school until last year, so I used to go during the week if he was doing a reading at Mass.What type of groups does your parish offer? RCIA, CCD, KofC, women's groups (mostly older ladies), Theology on Tap (young adults)Do you take part in in any of the groups or activities in your parish or other parishes in your city? My dh went through RCIA himself and helped teach it for several years after that. He will go and guest lecture occasionally now. We sometimes go to CC's adoption support groups---just gave a talk on entrustment and baptism ceremonies. We are working on this year's CC "Walk for Adoption" and have agreed to chair next year's event.Does your parish or other parishes in your city have any groups for adoptive families? Our local CC holds adoption support groups, which meet about once a month. Lots of different parishes are represented, and the folks that come are at all stages in the process---still waiting, international, domestic, some with kids that are teens, some with brand new infants.

Do you attend mass more than once a week?If there is a Holy Day. Although I've not always made it weekly, with the baby! I ended up leaving him at home with Daddy yesterday and going it alone (nice, but the homily was about marriage, so it would have been nice to have hubby there!) We dont' have a cry room or nursery for during Mass, which is usually fine with me, but baby A is in a very squirmy and noisy stage right now. What type of groups does your parish offer?Not a lot. We are a tiny parish who shares a priest with 2 other parishes. Our PLC does A LOT, but it's hard. We have SRE and I think there's still an adult class for part of the year during Sunday school for the kids. During Lent we usually have a special group - I like to participate in that. Do you take part in in any of the groups or activities in your parish or other parishes in your city? Before Baby, I helped a lot with teaching SRE and Bible school. ONce he's old enough to be involved in that, I'll start up again. We don't have a MOPS-type of group - I wish we did! I"ve also sponsored for RCIA - that was an AWESOME experience. I will definitely do it in the future again some time. I learned so much, while I was supposed to be helping someone else learn! Does your parish or other parishes in your city have any groups for adoptive families?[/quote] No. They couldln't even tell me the local contact for adoption with our Catholic Charities! I work full time during the day now, and don't want to take any time away from my son when I'm home. I hope to move to part tiem work or work at home or just stay at home in the next couple of years. Then I plan to be more active and volunteer for our CC agency and our parish. Once babe gets a little older, I'll also be able to do more w/ the church.

Does your parish or other parishes in your city have any groups for adoptive families?[/quote] No. They couldln't even tell me the local contact for adoption with our Catholic Charities! Isn't the above observation amazing? I find it unbelievable that there is not more knowlege of and encouragement of adoption in the Catholic Church. Especially at the parish level. It still seems to be a taboo subject. I've volunteered to be a "go to" person if anyone in the parish has any inquiries, but have yet to be contacted. We shall see. I may be out of the loop, but it seems like the only two options focused on are life vs. abortion. I hope there are people out there advocating the adoption option as well. If you are more knowledgable than I am in this area, please feel free to correct me! Sorry I don't have time to answer your other questions right now....

I think that can really differ from place to place---there's an older thread on this board about why the church isn't more supportive. One person offered the rationale that the lack of support for adoption is somehow tied to the Catholic Church's outlook on personal responsibility, which I find hard to believe. Our diocese is very supportive and positive about adoption, so I don't think it's necessarily a Church (with a big C) policy---makes you wonder what drives the attitudes one way or the other, doesn't it? I think mysomeone raises a good point---it does strike me as ridiculous to make vociferous arguments supporting life inside the womb but stop short of supporting it once it's outside the womb.

I guess my concern is that most people, secular and religious, are woefully, completely, utterly ignorant of the ins and outs of adoption. I'm the first to admit that I was, until our infertility set our feet on this awesome adventure of adoption and we set out to educate ourselves. My suspicion, due to the above concern, is that consellors are presenting only two real options to women in crisis pregnancy situations: you can (God forbid) abort, or you can have the baby and keep it. And if a woman is so desperate to be seeking advice on this subject from her parish priest (or lay person), isn't she looking for a solution that will avoid abortion but also let her find a way to continue living her life without the burden of every day parenthood? Isn't adoption (especially open adoption) a valid, life-affirming solution to this dilemma? How many advisors have the depth of knowledge to present this option to those who could use it? Not many, I suspect, besides those of us who are living it every day. This is a passionate subject for me. Hope I've expressed myself clearly without insulting anyone.

I only go on Sundays and holy days of obligation. I used to go to daily mass when I was younger. They have the Knights of Columbus, a women's group (don't know the name of it), a biblical study group, a book club, a teen club, and kids educational programs, perpetual adoration, and they have "missions" for spiritual growth a couple times per year. They also do a lot of community work. It's a very active parish. I used to be part of perpetual adoration but it's harder with the kids. I take the Maire-Kate to religious ed but it's hard to commit to other weekly or even monthly activities. We have a LOT of adopted kids in our parish. China seems to be the country of choice for most parishioners but there are a lot of foster families who have adopted their foster children. It's pretty diverse. Despite all the families created by adoption, there is no support group. I should probably try to get together with other adoptive parents to create one

We go once a week, and on Holy days. There are a number of groups and activities in our parish. I am active with the Liturgy commettee and on the Gabriel project. We used to have a set adoration time but since M's arival we have cut that out. I imagine as she gets older I will start taking her. Our parish does not have adoption groups that I am aware of. The do know about and are supportive of Catholic Charities. We didn't use CC because of the wait time. But our parish has always been very supportive in our adoption journey.

If there's a Holy Day. There's a lot of Religious Ed, Beginning Church, all sorts of social/community service activities. I am on the Pro-Life committee as well as a worker in the "harvest garden" that grows food for area charities No, but there are several families who've adopted that I know of so far. One used the same CC agency we did, and I did talk to them a little before our placement. Several families have done international adoptions as well. I feel more at home in this parish as an adult than I ever did in the parish where I grew up (different city).

Do you attend mass more than once a week? Sometimes, depends on the week. We have a Franciscan Friary close to our home and they have the most lovely mass at noon. When I have a bad day or need a little connection I love to go there for prayer. What type of groups does your parish offer? We have a huge parish (4700 families) they have a lot of groups...CCD...respect life committee, adult Bible Studies, Chior, Knights of Columbus, Catholic Daughters....the list goes on and on...a lot to get involved in. Do you take part in in any of the groups or activities in your parish or other parishes in your city? I am a Scripture study leader, have enjoyed choir in the past, and am part of the evangelism ministry. We also present Catholic Engaged Encounter weekends.

Does your parish or other parishes in your city have any groups for adoptive families? NO! That is my bigest frustration, we have so much in our huge parish and nothing to support those who are adopting. They couldn't even tell us to go to CC's. It is something we looked into first. They told us they place 4-6 domestic adoptions per year and were not very nice. One good thing though is I met the head of our respect life committee and she has offered to pass the word for us to a lady who directs the crisis pregnancy counseling service. She was very nice.

I kinda fear what will happen when we want to have our child baptized...considering the cluelessness we found at the begining of our journey.

I have to say though I love our parish, we truly feel at home there. We just dedicated a new church a few months ago, it has the Basilica windows from Baltimore's Basilica that is under renovation right now. It is so beautiful. The people are wonderful there, just clueless when it comes to adoption. Maybe we should step up and offer to help.

Elizabeth