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So my bio mom passed away before I ever got the chance to meet her. All I know is that me and my sisters are alot like her in many ways. She was supposedly very hyper and yet a fighter for her rights, Just like myself. I feel as though not knowing her for who she was leaves alot of questions unanswered. I guess this question I have could really be aimed to bioparents, but anyones input on this is welcome. If you havent met your b-child, what would be the top 10 things you would want your child to know about you? Not meaning stuff like why the adoption was taken place, but what different things would help a child fill that void?
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Good morning DJ-As a searching BMom that recently found out my son is deceased, here's what I did. It may sound silly but I am trying to get to know him. Here's what I've done:Visited his apartment. Stood in the doorway and prayed for him.visited the grade school he went to.Talked to friends he went to school with. Found out he played the guitar and left some recordings. I'm going to get copies.Visited his gravesite.Got samples of his handwriting.Simple things, I only recently found out he's deceased so there's a lot more I want to know!Good luck to you!Kim
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Aw, I know how sad it is to reach what we hope is the end of our search and then to find out that our bmom has passed away. It happened to me too.
I have spoken with friends of my bmoms to get a "feel" of what she was like as a person. I have talked with my bsibs too although I think it is hard to be objective because we see our parent as a mom or a dad not who they are as a "person". I have gone to the cemetary to place flowers on her grave. I have poured over photos. I have driven through her old neighborhood. In all of the bits and pieces I've picked up I've found the "whole" - my birth mom.
Don't be afraid to grieve for what you will never know, someone you'll never hug. That is normal too.
I hope you find what you are looking for.
Snuffie