Checking In With Mother's Day Approaching

I found bson this January, so this will be my first Mother's Day with him back in my life. We haven't done F2F yet. So, I'm plaguing myself numerous times each day, wondering if he will acknowledge me for Mother's Day... ugh.... sigh... Susan :hippie:

i cant believe my last post got deleted...:eek: here goes again sigh

here goes again.....:coffee: well adoptive mom phoned me last mothers day saying she was going to send a picture ...that never happened....alsoshe said she would send another picture this mothers day with another phone calli guess we shall see but i doubt it... talk about a double wammy...sigh then i get a letter :coffee: telling me to never try to make contact with that couple from attorney....sigh needless to say im feeling a bit sad this mothers day ... hmmm i wonder why.........:coffee: im going to post this and write more just in case it gets deleted again....

on the other hand.... its amazing the bond from the womb....i think of how many times ive thought of my daughter and wondered if shes happy ....is she ok......all the things a mother would wonder..... praying shes ok and praying for a glimpse of her..... i have to give God glory and honor for what he has given me.....God has been so gracious to me.....starting to heal my broken heart.....i used to cry myself to sleep wondering how shes doing.....asking God for peace of mind ...asking God if adoption is so great then why am i suffering so much emotional pain.....God never seems to rush anything....but its amazing how God knows how much we can and cannot handle.....He obviously knew i couldnt take it anymore.....the pain was too great.... tks to God i am starting to heal emotionally....tku Jesus:flowergift: still a long ways to go... i have to forgive that couple sometimes daily and bless them cause the Bible tells me too....not to harbour resentment ....for that only harms me... doesnt mean im happy with what they have done.....but i HAVE to forgive ...and you know it does free the mind when you do.....amazing.... the precious child i so lovingly gave to a couple who couldnt have children on their own......i have turned it around and felt pity for them as they apparently wanted a child so desperately....my feelings go up and down as that would only be natural..... ok writing more ....

then thinking of the amazing bond from raising the baby in the womb for 9 months.... wowi was thinking wow i rubbed my tummy and sang songs .....no wonder the amazing bond from the womb.... no wonder i have been in so much pain all these years.....giving my flesh and blood to someone else to raise....wow makes me think how unselfish i trully was....i just pray that she is ok and that one day we will be reunited cause of the incredible bond from the womb...praying for the right timing also....i want God to bring us together at the right time..... i know it must be hard to comprehend for those whos womb is barren..... so those are my thoughts at this mothers day ..... i pray Gods blessing upon all mothers:flowergift:

I'm in the same boat as Suddenly Susan. My bson and I started contact last June and this is the "first" mother's day since we've been corresponding (no F2F yet). Walking on eggshells. Sometimes I'm hopeful he will acknowledge mother's day but at other times I know he has a mom and step-mom who have been there for the last 26 years so, logically, I think it would be hard to get a card or letter. I don't want to be disappointed but at the same time it would be so wonderful if there was some expression. I know I'm not making any sense but it's the heart vs. head scenario. All the best. :coffee:

Not going well this year for many reasons.

I'm so glad this forum is here. Hugs to all of us. Peace, Susan :hippie:

Well, I just set myself up for disappointment... I talked to SW and she said that D (A's amom) was working on a letter for me that she said she would get to me in two weeks with some pics...well Mother's Day is two weeks away, so my mind went straight to "She's going to recognize that it's Mother's Day, and that it MEANS something to me!" and maybe she will, which would be great, but maybe she won't which I will totally accept, except now I let myself have hope, and I don't think I can help but be let down if it doesn't work out that way...

Oh TGmom, I can relate...I've had to calm myself down since the e-mail from my 2 1/2 yr old's mom about more openness because I'm worried that if I get my hopes up too much, I'll get let down too.Of course, that's different than Mother's Day, but I can relate to the building yourself up and having hope only to be let down or to be left hanging and unsure.Sending big hugs to you...hang in there and hopefully she will recognize to you that it's Mother's Day and that it means something to you. I hope she does and that it turns out to be a great letter and pics and not a let down because Mother's Day is hard enough.I'll be thinking of you and hoping that it works out good for you this Mother's Day.

Well, I will be seeing E the day before since because of the conference last weekend and I have a show to go to this week, I am hoping that I will take some time and walk around downtown Boston since I am done with my session early enough. Now just hoping that it will be a nice day. All though for the real kicker in all this -- I just had to help my Grandmother select a present to send to my Aunt, her daughter, for Mother's Day. :(

I just bought Mother's Day cards...one for my mom, my grandma, my step-mom, my boyfriend's mom, my boyfriend's sister-in-law (His brother passed away just months after the baby was born)...I just didn't have the energy to find a good card for my birthdaughter's a-mom. Maybe this weekend... I am happy this year because for the first time since P was born, I actually get to spend Mother's Day with MY mom! We are going out to a nice Brunch and then to a greenhouse to buy flowers. I like that.

I'm an adoptee, I hope it's okay to post here. :love: I'm in the process of having the agency try to contact b-mom. Getting close to 3 months. Letter has been returned for wrong address, playing the waiting game now. If I could have one wish, it would be that I could tell her happy mother's day this year. If not in person, at least a card or something. :love: Even though I don't really know her, I know her in my heart and she will always be there. Even if she doesn't want contact. Great big hug to each and every b-mom!!!! You all are amazing and give me hope everyday.

You're totally welcome to post here, Manda :D.I always love to hear from adoptees and I hope things work out for you that you'll be able to make contact with your bmom soon.Thanks for your kind words :flowergift:.

Thanks Anne :love: It's just hard to censor feelings, you know? Like I realistically can hope for the best, prepare for the worst, but I just wish I could stop my mind from wandering too far into that hoping for the best place... I really hope that we all get what we need this Mothers Day, both bparents, adoptees, and aparents. (and not JUST on Mother's day of course!...especially with your hopeful openess sitatuion Anne!)