Many, Many prayers needed....

Adding my prayers too and praying for the day when you join us "on the other side". Has it gone to court and you're waiting for the decision? I have forgotten the dates...

StacyKelly2, You have my heart, my prayers, my love, my support. I think of you every day and pray for you and Baby Jude. When I can't sleep at night I pray for you. I believe your court date is tomorrow, is that right? What a tough, tough time for you. I am so sorry. It is unbelievable that these birthparents who have been given multiple opportunities - time and time again - to parent, but decline to and then just let it drag out in court. It is something which weighs heavily in the background of our lives as we attempt to go to work, care for our children, become financially ruined, creating in us immense fear - all the while shielding this pain from our children so they do not see. And in your case, and mine, and daddysangel, and others the birthparents who have been given multiple opportunities to parent but then don't, but then keep contesting - it doesn't make any sense. You are doing the right thing. I feel very, very good about your case. I pray the judge will see that in both of our cases the birthparent has had many opportunities to parent, to visit, but they do not. At some point someone has to recognize that the birthfather (in yours and daddysangel's cases) and birthmom in mine have rejected every opportunity given to them by the law and by the adoptive parents. We have NOT tried to keep our children from their birthparents in any manner, shape or form. We have both gone above and beyond what the courts have ordered to try and incorporate the birthparents into our child's lives. Yet still it does not get settled. And it leaves a sinking feeling of worry, fear, and lack of finality which is needed in order for all of us to heal. I even offered the birthmom to just come and live with us and raise her child as hers. We would help her. She said no. Then I tried as hard as I could to have her become a part of his life through visits, pictures, phone calls - but no, she has rejected all of those offers as well. But yet she keeps filing motions against us preventing finality and keeping us in emotional and financial turmoil. This I will never understand. She could have raised him - with our help or without. She could have visited any time. We invited her over and over to see him. We have pictures still set aside to give to her but her lawyer won't give us an address to send them. We even offered sending pictures through the lawyers, phone calls through the lawyers or separately. She did not want any of that either. I am at a total loss as to what she wants. I am also at a total loss as to how this can continue on for both of us - for all of us on this board going through this same thing. They all could have parented; they were ALL given that opportunity many times. But to keep saying one thing and then another and getting what the birthparents said they wanted only to turn around and say no - I will never understand that. In my case what more could I have done? I asked her to come live with us and we would help her raise her child with her being Mommy. Or I would help out in any way I could. She kept saying she only wanted us to adopt and that 1. She wanted us to adopt and parent; 2. She wanted visits but then did not do them. 3. She wanted pictures which she has now refused. I am ALL for birthparents raising their children - but when it is the birthparent who seeks out adoption and is determined to do it - that is the point at which adoptive parents step in. What is it that people expect us to do? What more can we do? How is this allowed to drag on for five years? And in your case it is two years. And in daddysangel's case their daughter's birthfather has had a court order where he could pick her up at any time but he refuses. Yet they keep the turmoil going. It seems like at some point a judge has got to realize that the birthparent has had opportunity again and again and again but does not follow through. In my case the birthmom has filed plenty of motions against us - and won - but then did not want what she won. So now we have another unresolved court motion and it seems like it will never end. Of course she gets free legal services so there is no financial impact on her - but on us it is devastating. Just like in your case, the birthparent is able to drag it out and out and out. And even getting what they want - then won't take it. Won't parent. Won't visit. Won't take any part in both of our child's life except for legal proceedings. I do know what the wait is like for the next hearing. I know how heartbreaking even the thought or possibility of losing our children is. I know the worries, the sleepless nights, the fear and sadness, the feeling that this will never end. But Sweetie, in your case I really believe that for you this will be finished. You will have the peace of mind and finalization which you and your family so desperately need and deserve. Baby Jude is so lucky to have such a strong mother who has been able to withstand whatever it took for his sake. I am HERE for you. I support you. I send you my love.:love: CS

You and your family are in my prayers and thoughts.

Thank you everyone for helping us through this emotional time. Christie S... we hold one another up, and God knows and sees the love we have for our angels. Its so hard trusting the court system because time and time again it seems like they just keep expecting us to give chance after chance- Like you I feel what more can we do? Coming on this board and expressing our feelings is all we can do. My son is my everything- and I have tons, and tons of letters handed to me from everyone at work, friends and family supporting us as parents. You don't know how happy that made me feel..to know there are so many people standing by us and supporting us. I am staying strong only broke down a few times - it is so hard. My heart feels so heavy...We will hold our angel in our arms tonight..and pray and pray..that God's will allow him to forever be in our family. He will always and forever have our hearts...and we know he is our precious little angel sent from God above!:wings:

Prayers coming your way! I BELIEVE that you will keep your angel!

StacyKelly2, Today I will hold you and baby Jude in special vigil. Today is the day your son can be given the permanent gift of the wonderful parents he has known and loved for two years. Today I pray for peace and finality for you, baby Jude, and your entire family. I will be with you all day in love, prayer, spirit, heart and soul. All I have I am offering up for you in God's grace and mercy that today your suffering will end and your family will be granted peace. I am here for you and wait with you for the outcome. Your friend, Christie

StacyKelly, I have asked many friends and family to pray for you. May you be held in God's strong arms today and until you hear, for certain that your son is yours forever. I strongly believe that he will stay right where he is, in the family that cares most about his best interest and has loved him through it all.

My prayers are with you. :flowergift: Jody

StacyKelly2, I'm praying for you and your family. May your judge have the wisdom of Solomon.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

You guys are making me cry!!! I pray that you get to keep your son. I pray that this can all be resolved today o you can sit on mothers day and thank GOD for your precious child that he has given to you and that can now FULLY be yours without any worries lingering in the back ground. This must be so difficult for you. We're still waiting on our sons adoption to be coplete after over two years....but our circumstances are much different than yours. Still my heart can't even go to that place of wonderign how we will survive, and get through if our precious angel can't be with us forever. It's unthinkable. Your in may prayers!!! Sending you my love!!! Jessica

Jessica, in the county where we live, birthparent appeals almost NEVER win. I'm adding you to my prayer list. Keep us posted.

Our appeal thank goodness is over. Our son has been legally free for adoption since Oct 06. We've had him since he was 8 weeks old. Now our problems are with the adoption unit. WHY are we still waiting....7 months later to finalize his adoption when we were ready to do it the moment he became legaly free? Why do we have court next week (another review) and probably won't even get to adopt him till the following court hearing probably in august/september...IF....and that's a big IF....everythign is ready? He will be 3.....HELLO 3 years old in October. This is taking WAY too long....for NO reason. When he was placed with us at 8 weeks they said they were going for an expedited termination of rights and he'd be coming up very soon for adoption. Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. This has been a Looooonnng road....and it's not over yet. I can't wait for the day he will finally be ours forever....but it seems like that day never comes....over and over again it gets pushed back. UUUUHGGG!!!

I've had you on my mind and in my heart all day............

I am praying that the hearing went well yesterday. I am hoping you have some good news to share. Please let us know. We are here for you regardless. Big (((HUGS))) Your friend, Christie