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Hi everyone,
I'm shaken by a nasty email that I received this morning from one of the other moms that we travelled to Viet Nam with. Now, mind you, we spent 3 weeks together with no problems.
I want to do a series of interviews of families who have recently adopted from VN, so I reached out to the families that I know first (she was one of them). I asked if they would be willing to answer some questions about their experience.
Well...I was told in no uncertain terms (and lots of caps locked sentiments) that I am no expert, I've only been to VN once, the advice that I give is "No Good" and on and on.
Not only am I beyond shocked, but I feel attacked. I hate to second guess my work, but that's how I feel now. I responded in a very polite way and offered her the chance to discuss what she feels is so inaccurate.
Has this kind of thing happened to anyone else and how did you handle it? I know I shouldn't let one person make me feel inadequate and ostracized, but it's still fresh. Can anyone talk me down? :hissy:
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I am just glad that I chose to write about nesting this week. LOL
I hope all of you can get a good laugh out of this (if not now, then soon) and continue with your excellent writing. If your writing was not effective, then you would not be getting the personal slams. Bashing is what people resort to when they no longer have a legitimate point to support their position.
The silver lining is that our page views should be WAY up this month. :)
- Faith
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Yes, I have gotten this type of response before. There is a woman on an email list that I frequent. She picks my words apart and lets me know just how much I don't know. But I have a wider body of knowledge about Ukrainian adoption. She adopted in 2007. I adopted in 2000 and have seen a lot more then she has. I think my "voice of experience" just annoys the crap out of her. She wants to know everything. Here is my habit for dealing with this type of thing. I recoil and reject it. Typically I won't read the post or email all the way through. I can feel my feelings getting hurt, so I push away. I will ask myself, "am I the mean one?" I answer myself, "no". Then I read the post all the way through this time. And I am looking to see if this person: a) has a valid pointb) has a mental diseasec) has thin skin because of family issues, getting ready to travel, etc...
Lisa, have you dealt with anti-adoption folks before? There are about 5 people in the United States who are 100% anti-adoption. And it sometimes takes years for them to let go of a thought. And Marsha isn't as strong willed as some of the Australian Origins folks. Hopefully Di doesn't drop by. I have been around adoption/anti-adoption writing since 1999. And this last week has been fairly mild.
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