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Hi,
I'm a single guy in Columbia, MO and I am just starting the process of becoming licenced to foster/adopt. Although I think I contacted DFS at just the right time because I begin the STARS training next Monday. When I initially applied, I listed 0-10 years on the foster/adoption application. Although the further along I go the more I am finding that I would prefer adopting a younger child (0-3).
I have a stable computer programming job at Mizzou. It is also flexible and and would allow me to work from home if need be.
I am hoping to hear about experiences from other singles who have adopted, and more specifically adopted younger children. What is the typical view most SWs have towards singles trying to adopt younger children? What is the average length of time for a placement? Can a placement be made after STARS licensing but before SPAULDING training? Am I asking too many questions? Etc.?
Adoption is something I have been thinking about for about 3 years. Now that I am actually persuing it, I am filled with excitement and have more questions than the internet or books can provide answers to. I look forward to anyone's response.
I am a sigle parent that had my placement before I attended the STARS and SPAULDING training due to me being a kinship placement, therefore, I can't say how long it actually takes for one to get a placement after becoming licensed, but I can say there are situations were some receive placements before licensing. I received my babygirl when she was 10 months, adoption final at 17 months. My experience with DFS was positive considering I didn't know what to expect or who to trust for that matter. I was involved in a contested adoption. So that's were the confusion and discomfort came from but overall the sw's didn't make a issue about my being single. So, on that note I can say it has all been an experience that has been worth every minute of it.
I wish you the best and encourage you to fulfill your desire to become a parent to a child that so much needs to be loved, nutured and parented. Whether, it comes from a single or two parent home.GOOD LUCK!
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I really didn't have any problems at all. I did have to have a detailed plan for what my support system would be since I would not have the support of a spouse. In my case, my parents, sister, and brother-in-law all live within fifteen minutes of me and they all help out a lot. My process also went very quickly. I started the process in February of 2006, received my adoption license in May of 2006, got matched with a 2 1/2 boy in July of 2006, and had placement in November of 2006. I'm really glad that I adopted a younger child, especially as a first-time parent. I just want to let you know though that younger children are often harder to get unless you're willing to accept special needs. My son (3 1/2 now) has cerebral palsy, hydrocephalus, and cognitive delays. He is my joy. I am currently pursuing a 23 month old girl in Oregon who has similar issues. Do you know if you want boys or girls? Good luck with this. The process is very stressful and draining, so reach out for support here and in real-time.
Leah
Single parenting has been a limitation in MY mind more than DFS's, I think. As a single female, I worried about older children and teens, so limited myself to ages 2-10. I also felt that I couldn't give my all to an infant since I must work and my teaching would suffer greatly from the common lack of sleep of infant parents. I am SO happy that I decided to foster (that's what I was doing till I met this little guy, anyway). It has truly changed my life, and I am excited now to have the opportunity to adopt this little guy. He was placed here, then moved to a fost/adopt with sibs but that deteriorated and he was placed back here (due to our bond) as an adoptive placement even though I haven't had the adoption classes. Those will start in Sept. I'm not holding my breath as I realize anything can happen, but in my heart (and my immediate family) he's already ours. jan