'fixing' discrimination issues?

Do you know any parents of children in the "problem" troop? Perhaps if you drop a bug in their ear, they will a) take up their concerns with the idiot leader, or b) pull their children out of the troop...Also, you may try confronting the idiot leader directly.Or you may just want to let it go, explain it to your children... and as much as I hate to say this... make it an unfortunate lesson in discrimination for them....Audrey

Unfortunately you can't fix discrimination issues. You can scream, yell, write letters and things may sway in your direction, but the bottom line is discrimination/stereotypes/prejudice is a way of thinking, not a system issue. Further, do you really want to subject your children to a group where they may not be "wanted." As parents, we want to do our best and more to protect our children from the evils of the world, however, you can't protect them from ignorance. From your signature line, it appears your children are aged 5-9 years old and are at an age where they're noticing differences amongst themselves and their peers and within their own family. Rather than fighting ignorance, you may want to begin (if you haven't already done so) instill ethnic pride and educate them about racism--in an age appropriate way, of course. I'm sure these weren't the answers you were looking for, but I do wish you and your children the best of luck!

I don't know who is in the new problem troop, I have my guesses, cause this problem leader lives in a development where they tend to do everything together. I just hate getting the 'what do you want me to do' from the higher ups in this organization. What I want and what they will do are sooo different. I want them to send this leader to some type of racial sensitivity bootcamp (I have no clue if this even exists) I have been very very careful to try not to draw extra attention to my girls. There are very few non-white children in our elementary school (our district numbers aren't so harsh, but our elementary school is less then 1%) I have talked to the girls about what was going on, have talked to them about how the parents making lousy decisions should not bring them to treat the children poorly. My girls are proud of their heritage, and they think people who have a problem with it are 'just plain dumb' (that's what my youngest says)

Not knowing exactly what this organization is, I'm doing a guessing game here. But, if it's a well-known one that supposedly celebrates diversity----like Girl Scouts, 4-H, etc......I think it would be a good idea to make a big deal about it. There are times when you might choose to let things ride....but if it's a group that brags about it's diversity to all, etc......this is reason to go up the ranks and make things known. Having been involved with both of these groups for many years, I would tell you that any 'leader' who would have a problem with 'anything other than white'....wouldn't be allowed to continue in that position. Yes, there may be times to remain quiet-----I understand completely. But, there are also times when 'leaders' of groups are supposed to behave and believe in certain ways---ahd if they don't.....this is cause for them to be removed from their positions. While you've probably already checked on this, is it possible to enroll your children in a group that may be further away, but more realistic about life...to say the least? Sincerely, Linny

I am trying not to name the organization just because I hate to trash the larger group that is doing good things. This is a group that is all about diversity and building better people. Last year I did transport my oldest to another group, about 15 minutes from home. She enjoyed the activities, but their were conflicts such as this group scheduled around the 'home' schools events, not my daughters school. Also she had many of her friends attend fun events with the group she wasn't welcome in her home school.

Ha! So it is a group that boasts itself to promote diversity and bettering lives. In that case, those are the times when you do need to jump up and down, scream, write letters, and make some waves. If you feel in your heart that their ethics are wrong and contradictory, I think you should do your best to find out who is behind the scenes of the organization and bring this matter to their attention. Are there board members? Or is there a local advocacy center near you? By the way, I'm glad to hear that your children are proud of themselves and their heritage! Maybe is now the time to teach them to learn to stand proud and "fight" for their rights. I'm not at all saying they need to be spokespersons for their racial group, but if you are in an area where they are the "minority" they will face more racial issues and will need to learn how to cope and battle with it.

I just wanted to give my 2 cents on the matter as a person of color because Ive been in the position where this issue has come up before. For a start read everything you can on the bylaws of this organization. Are all chapters required to follow the same membership requirements? Do they have one of those clauses that say each chapter is independently operated and can have their own membership criteria in addition to the national requirements? If you are going to fight this, How far are you willing to go? If you get the leader removed are you willing to step in and take her place? If the troop is pretty much a clique and the leader takes all the current members with her, is that okay? Can you help recruit all new members of the troop if they walk in support of the current leader? What if they are willing to shut down that chapter to keep the status quo? All this kind of stuff can happen. Do you plan on living there permanently? Will the kids be in that school or switching to a private one? How would fighting this impact your children? Do they go to school with those kids? Would they be ostracized? They could end up taking the fallout from the situation because kids donҒt necessarily have the self censoring abilities that adults have. The kids in the troop have most likely heard their parents making comments. Do you really want your kids in a group where they are not wanted? If the leader acquiesced and the kids were let in you would have to constantly monitor the situation. Do you have that kind of time and energy? It is really draining but some people have the fortitude to hang in there. You have to choose your battles carefully in situations like this. Just based on the information you posted I would complain but I would not put my kids in that chapter. ItŒs better for your kids to not be in a hornets nest.

Very good points to consider, Sleep! Very good. Sincerely, Linny