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I just have to chime in here as after reading this thread and all the responses, I feel a bit wrong in how I am handling DD's adoption story. I don't hide it even when not asked by those I know (whether close friends or just acquaintances). For some reason, being in an OA and having contact with DD's Bmom, visits once a year, emails regularly, etc., I feel that as DD gets older and understands the conversation, she might feel I am negating BMom's part in her. Am I wrong? I will, as she gets older talk to her and ask her how she feels her story should be told or if it should be told. I want her to feel that it is up to her. But I don't want her feeling like her BMom is part of not our triad family.
I am a step mother as well and for so many years my DH and I were referred to as my son's mom and dad. For a while, he corrected them. Eventually, he just ignored it knowing that we were a a family and it wasn't worth the entire story to straighten people out. DD may eventually get to this but I want it to be her choice without my influence. Am I over thinking this?:arrow: