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Hi! I am new here and am having some major confusion/doubt. My husband and I have two biological children and have always contemplated adoption or more biological children but I was never sure. About two weeks ago, I got a feeling of peace about it and felt sure I was meant to adopt and that now was the time. So I began the tedious process of researching agencies, etc. My excitement only grew with more knowledge, even though it seemed daunting. But now that I am (I think) ready to send in an application and start my home study, I have this worried feeling, and I am questioning my decision. Obviously, I will pray about this and ask what God's will is for my family. I thought I already had the answer to that. Is this just cold feet? How can I be sure? I already feel as though I've been neglecting my family with the amount of time I've been putting into this. Am I doing right by them by starting on a long journey that will lead to more uncertainty, financial strain and turmoil? Surely the love we will be adding to our family will outweigh those concerns? Thanks for letting me vent. If any of you have stories about how you knew adoption was right for you, I'd love to hear them. Thanks!
My story is a little different as I couldn't have children. But, even then making the HUGE decision to adopt is still overwhelming. With each step of the process completed I knew we were meant to go down this path.
The biggest thing that solidified that we were on the right path was that we brought home 6 week old twin girls for a week during Thanksgiving. We saw the change in them within a day or so. The smiles, the laughing, and even the crying. The bmom decided to parent. As hard as that was to go thru it sealed our fate in what were meant to do. If you aren't scared you aren't ready. Good luck and keep us posted.
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Hello! Welcome to the forums. :)
Of course, no one can tell you what to do, but I personally beleive doubts are normal, no matter how much you were sure ahead of time. Getting to the point of turning in the application can be scary. Keep praying and God will guide you through.
Welcome to the group,
I felt God calling me to adopt since I was a teen, but the uncertainty that hit me when I was about to mail in my application surprised me. A great group of Christian women told me that it was normal. I was about to embark on a journey that would forever change my life, for the better, but still a gigantic change. All you can do is, what you're doing, pray.
When I embarked on my international adoption, friends asked me how was I going to afford it, when I look at the big picture I worry how I'm going to afford it, but I stay in prayer about it. And God is good and He is gracious and I've put my faith in Him to guide me each and every step of the way on this journey and whenever money was due He provided it.
God bless you and your family as you embark on this wonderful, heart pumping, aggrevating, frustrating, miraculous journey. Welcome to the rollercoaster!
Thank you ladies for the encouragement. I had been praying before for God to open my husband's heart to this, as he seemed to have more uncertainties than I did about it. I was nervous about telling him how scared I was feeling because I thought that he might change his mind about adopting. Last night, he came fully on board and said he thought we should just go for it. I am still scared, but I also still think this is a good decision for us. You are right that all I can do now is pray and put it in God's hands.
I can sooooo empathize with you! I have 4 bio children, and feel strongly called to foster/adopt. My husband is uncertain, so I'm waiting and praying for the right time, and praying that God softens his heart and puts this desire as strongly in his heart as He has in mine.
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Melissa_bear,
Fost/adopt is definitely the hardest time of adoption there is. Pray not only for your husband, but also for your four children. Adopting from foster care is gut wrenching. If this is the route God is laying on your heart, my prayers are with your whole family.
We have since submitted our application and are almost done with our home study, and the feeling of peace has returned. I have had to fend off some criticism and nay-sayers about our decision, and it has done nothing but strengthen my commitment to this decision! And my husband is as excited as I am. :clap: God doesn't ask us to do more than we can handle, and I don't think He keeps His Will a secret if we ask it to be shown to us. My doubts were just cold feet, as is probably normal with any life-changing decision. Keep asking Him to show you, and you will find the right way for your family. This is not a road without challenges, but He will see us through! Good luck with your decision. :flower: