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I was reading a similar question on another board and wanted to hear as many responses as possible from all adoptees.
Is there anything you wish your a.parents did differently?
I am A.parent trying to do my best and hope my child has the happiest life. BTW, her second b'day is tommorow so i am very mushy these days. :-)
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"Momto 1 human 2furry"
First, I have wonderful parents. I have no negative feelings towards them for the way in which I was raised. They did the best they could with the information they had. They love me like crazy and never did anything to make me doubt that. I love them just the same and I'm so blessed God put me in their care.:)
However...I wish more info would have been available to them about the issues adoptees may have due to being separated from their natural mother. Also that issues really do exist! If only they had all the books and info available now back then. I might have been able to get help in dealing with issues early on.
As for books...I like these authors; Sherrie Eldridge, Joel Soll & Nancy Verrier. They have many great books that would help any aparents with insights into the adoptee's world.
Thank God there are aparents who care enough to educate themselves. You are awesome!
my adoptive parents were my foster parents from age 3-6 1/2 i was legally adopted when i was 7 and i didn't understand the concept,only that i knew i was adopted. Don't get me wrong they did provide for me by getting me clothes,feeding me taking me on trips etc. but the one thing that was non exsistant was them telling me they loved me,supporting me when i was asked to share my hopes/dreams for my future. I was always on the recieving side of some form of Physical or Verbal abuse growing up,ranging from "we made a mistake about you","we had no choice because no one wanted a child with so many problems etc etc. I'm 25 and the latest one was i wish we had washed our hands of you before we knew what we were getting into.
it was mostly my adopted mom and me my adopted dad would just stand there and let her do all that she did and when i tried to talk or fight back to defend myself it was always "Teri Stop It" it was NEVER Dori stop it. Everything was my fault. When i know it wasn't. I was spat on,hit with a belt,hand,shoes,i had my hair pulled,i was laughed at constantly when it came to sharing my hopes/dreams of where i saw myself when i was grown etc. My adoption wasn't a match made in heaven.
Anyway I met my birth mom when i was 13 and our relationship has grown tremendously and now i'm a proud big sister of 2 little sisters C c(6) and Lil Rose(1)
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