The search begins.....

Susie, I am a bmom and an adopted child. I can only speak for my myself - I wanted to know my bmom. We had a rough start, then a stop, then a start again. I'm sorry to report that she died at age 55, but when she died, she was not just my bmom, she was my best friend. She's been gone over 9 years now and I still miss her. Getting to know her, filled in lots of pieces for me - we were very much alike in many ways. As a bmom myself (closed adoption, gave my child up 27 years ago - just recently reunited), I always wondered if the child I gave up was OK. I put my info out there when he turned 18, hoping he would someday find me. I never felt I had the right to seek him out, but I did what I could to make it easier to be found. I spent 27 years not knowing if he was alive, healthy, happy, loved. He found me (Christmas Eve 2008 I received a letter from him) and we corresponded insane amounts for about a month and we met face-to-face in Feb. We are working on trying to build some sort of relationship. It is not easy by any stretch - for anyone involved in adoption - me, him, his aparents and sibling, my children, my spouse - it affects everyone - all in different ways. I happen to think that the child has a right to at least know who their parents were and get medical history, maybe have a picture, so they can see where their features may come from, etc. I never would have turned my back on the child I gave up. We may not ever become mother and child like I am with my other children that I raised, but I hope we will at least become friends. All this long-winded stuff is basically to wish you well in your search!! Try very hard to keep an open mind and not have expectations. Extremely difficult to do. You just never know what the circumstances around your adoption were, where your bparents could be in their lives now, what impact you finding them could have. I think in most cases, it is worth the effort. Good luck!!!

Here's what I found in CA birth records. So I know you where you were born and maybe your father is still in Cali, I'll start there. It's a long shot without their first names. If you have any other info that might be helpful please send it my way as well. Could you tell me what your middle names are? Maybe they gave your their first names as your middle, just a thought. You have to look at all angles. Let me know your thoughts. Nikki Name: Joseph C Strizver Birth Date: 1 Mar 1970 Gender: Male Mother's Maiden Name: Smith Birth County: Alameda Name: Dorothy M Strizver Birth Date: 1 Mar 1970 Gender: Female Mother's Maiden Name: Smith Birth County: Alameda

Ok, I have been searching for my biological mother for years now... This last year or so I have searching consistantly even getting an investigator. I have to say that I got a few steps forward then hit a brick wall! I can't afford to pay for and investigator. Where is Troy the Locator??? The one who understands supposedly??? I went contacted them just to be turned to an investigator that cost alot and didn't get me anywhere. I felt like she wanted me to do everything. What did I pay for??? Ugh anyway I really want to find where I came from and who I look like all the normal adoptee curiosities... I did learn what my real name was at birth and that I have a half sister somewhere out there. Thats it though. I have nothing but non identifying information and what my last name might have been... How do people keep going??? This is so exhausting.. I want to cry. I REALLY NEED to know who my mom is!!!! HELP ME PLEASE anyone with a heart and sympathy for my situation.... I feel lost and out of place

Suzi ~ I was surprised to see you post after all this time. I'm sorry your search hasn't brought you closer. Is there any info that you could pass along that you have found that might give those of us on the board something to go on? I'm by no means a professional, but you never know, you might give a clue that points someone in the right direction. Let us know! take care!