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My husband met someone last week who is a 40 year old adoptee (she is a black woman, btw, whose birth mom was 14 or 15 yo when she was born...in case someone fitting this description sees this). Anyway, she was recently diagnosed with ovarian cancer and would like to find her birth mom. My husband's looking online suggested to him DC has "closed records" (urrgh) and that she may need to petition the court for her records....Has anyone done this and can anyone offer any advice about whether these petitions are usually allowed, etc.? I feel so sad for thiis woman. TIA.
Love,
She needs to talk to the county where her adoption took place. She will need to ask for the form or the requirements needed so that the judge can make his/her decision.
With my disease (rare) my doctors strongly urged me to get my records opened so that a) they had the knowledge of other genetic concerns to protect me from further events and b) because my disease probably has a genetic component and potentially fatal first presentation there was a need to advise my birth family to protect them.
In the case of ovarian cancer there is both a genetic connection as well as the need to be proactive for those at risk. The doctor should write a note confirming that medically it is important for both sides to know so she can submit that with her petition (form).
Kind regards,
Dickons
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LoveAjax, my gut-level instincts are telling me that there probably won't be much trouble getting a judge to open your friend's adoption records. Ovarian cancer is notorious for having a genetic connection. If her birthmom also had ovarian cancer, it'll be important for your friend's oncologist to know how the birthmom responded to specific therapies.
I would also imagine that any judge worth his or her salt would have a deep level of compassion for your friend. I'm not an adoptee, so I can't say for sure how I would feel if I were in your friend's shoes. But I know that one of my best friends, Julie, asked me to track down her birthmom for her about a week or so before she died. I had the feeling Julie really wanted to reach out and know the woman who had given her life and that she wanted to let her know that her life (Julie's) was drawing to a close.
Thank you, both, and I am going to encourage dh to help her fill out the forms...dh and I just got so sad that this woman has to go thru this c.rap. (Sorry my own soapbox!)