kids sibling now in foster care

No resolution yet.......... keeps getting uglier.

Keep fighting for that baby - and the kids you have. They deserve to be together! No matter how ugly it seems to get, you are doing the right thing, and hopefully someone will take notice and take up your cause. Keep us posted.

I'd say at this point you really may want to get your state rep and congressman involved. I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time with something that should be a no brainer. I'm so tired of this "system" not thinking of the best interests of the children involved. I really don't understand how they think anymore. :grr:

Getting uglier. We have state reps involved. I've ticked off the office pretty bad, but we're not stopping. I just discovered a "CASA" type person, we'll see what that accomplishes.

Bamamom - I have checked your posts for updates a couple of times. I am glad you are fighting for these siblings!! This is craziness! The FP who have our FD's sib is getting ready to launch a campaign to keep them seperated. Right now all agencies are saying "no way, they will be together" but no action yet. So, I'm following your situation with great interest.

Bamamom - I have checked your posts for updates a couple of times. I am glad you are fighting for these siblings!! This is craziness! The FP who have our FD's sib is getting ready to launch a campaign to keep them seperated. Right now all agencies are saying "no way, they will be together" but no action yet. So, I'm following your situation with great interest.

Well.... an update on our absolutely unbelievable situation. I made alot of phone calls and got alot of people involved, and at a planning meeting I was recently allowed to attend there was a room full- probably 20 people. Anyway, long story short, seems the result of complaining about the baby being set up to be adopted out when we were right there waiting to take her, is a reunification with the mother who had her in such a situation originally that there was thought to be no way an RU should be attempted. But-- they got busted, so I guess sending her home seemed the right thing to do. She went home one week ago. At least, the foster parents are supposedly out of the picture now. They are seriously crazy. Friends are concerned for my safety now. And we wait to see how long THIS RU will last, and pray for the baby to be safe. We continue with our visits, and hope next time, she comes home.

Wow. Cuddos to you for working so hard at trying to get that baby with siblings. It is so crazy that they did that in the first place. I'm sure none of us can understand why except that sometimes people make those decisions based on personal reasons and not on what is best for the child. We lost two placements due to CW's stopping the placement. One did not want to travel farther out of their city to our house and another because the CW didn't want the child out of her jurisdiction. She was too attached to the child.

Update.... the RU with mom continues, it's at 3 months now. Maximum support seems to be in place, even with fulltime daycare provided even though mom doesn't work. She's also 8 months pregnant. The latest "fiancee" has now disappeared. Nothing has changed in her many years long pattern of behavior that cost her all her other children. I'm not thinking she's going to maintain "minimally adequate parenting" for too long after the new baby is born. We are visiting baby sister at DHR, those are going well, and the CW really seems to like us and respect what we are doing. Supervisor however, is smiling in our faces while maintaining a bit of passive aggressiveness. We have NO assurance when RU fails that we will be baby girl and new baby's resource. Mom actually requested me to babysit baby girl while she is in hospital to have new baby... I readily agreed, but supervisor said I am out of county therefore no, and baby sister will go to foster parents she doesn't know instead. Now that's thinking of the child's best interests- whatever! My children are stressed... they love to visit... they hate to drive away as their sister cries and pitches a fit for them. They hate to wonder if she is being taken care of.. of what's going to happen when she isn't... what's going to happen to the new baby.... will there be another new baby after this one..... are the hate-filled former foster parents REALLY out of the picture... I feel like I need to recruit someone close by who would be willing to become an adoptive resource for any future babies, as there are still several more years of fertility left, and if we DO get these two children, I think that would have to be IT. But who is crazy enough to sign up for this soap opera drama and neverending heartbreak of children???

Can't the bio mom make you guys guardians in case something goes wrong?? If you're on speaking terms with her, and she's indicated interest to keep the siblings together, she still has rights, expecially with the yet to be born baby, and she may be able to legally change all this herself?

If Mom currently has custody of the child why can't you watch her while she is in the hospital? From the standpoint of the county I could see saying no if you were charging them to babysit/respite but I would assume that taking her for free wouldn't make you say no. I fully expect to be in your shoes someday :(

Update? Happy Ending?

Mom didn't have custody of the little girl when new baby was born, and I def would not have charged anybody for taking care of her, someone there high up just hates me for interfering with the foster parents adopting her so they made as many hassles as they could. Six weeks after new baby was born, they even closed the case, saying mom was doing fine now. SIX WEEKS... they couldn't WAIT to be rid of the case! Well now it's been a year... mom still has custody of both babies, now 1 & 3 yrs old. We haven't visited in nearly a year, because of her acting crazy when she came here uninvited & unexpected. I was taking a nap before having to go work a nightshift when she showed up, then she left as I was getting ready to leave. Husband had come in late from a meeting and discovered her there with the children, and some friend of hers. While there, she decided my 17 yr old AD's boyfriend tried to molest my 8 yr AD. I got a phone call from DHR interpreter a couple of days later, and that's how I found out. Was a while before I knew if she had reported him or not. The therapist for my kids told me keep her the heck away from my kids. So we've not really had contact, although she sends text pictures of the little ones to my now 18 yr old AD. Recently, I heard she's back with the 3 yr old's father, who is absolutely not allowed anywhere near her. If DHR finds out, they'll remove the children for that alone, and probably seek termination of rights. The word on the street is they already were removed. I asked a DHR worker to find out if that's true, and they were not in the system 2 weeks ago, but who knows now. I emailed the caseworker from last year, letting him know I am aware of her status and that she has not changed, so when the children are picked up please let me know, I will come there and pick them up anytime, day or night. He read it, but did not respond. My next step is to write the former attorney for the little girl, and include our family story, with pictures. A problem the supervisor expressed last year, is we have a large family already. I do have 9 children.... but the oldest 4 are grown... of the ones remaining, 4 are the sibling group of these little ones... so that is totally irrevelant. These are not some cute little toddlers on a website, they're my kids' baby sister and brother. So, I feel like they'll be picked up sooner rather than later, I have to stay ready, and I expect the county to continue to act hateful and resistant. I never gave all the details, but it got extremely ugly last time, to the point where security was escorting my kids into the DHR building for visits while foster dad was being extremely threatening towards me. Maybe the high up person who wanted him to adopt the baby is gone now, but I doubt it.

That is just horrible. :( I definitely think the kids should stay together so long as you can provide for the other siblings in the same manner. I hope it all works out.

Bama, been there, done that! I contacted the ombudsmen. That my dear, was a joke. No avail here either. I havent tried a Congressman, but thats my next move cause this is crazy. Somebody has to care about what is happening in this system.