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My husband and I have adopted before. Our daughter is 3 years old through an identified adoption. We would like to add to our family and know how hard it is to find another "miracle identified adoption". However, it seems because we are older...48 and 47....that an identified adoption is our only way to add to our family. After all, do birthmoms really look at profiles of people our ages? Both adoption agencies that I talked too said that it would be rare for someone to pick us.
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I don't know about private adoptions, but I adopted my first child through foster care when I was 53 (and single) and he was 2.
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Jayteedee
My husband and I have adopted before. Our daughter is 3 years old through an identified adoption. We would like to add to our family and know how hard it is to find another "miracle identified adoption". However, it seems because we are older...48 and 47....that an identified adoption is our only way to add to our family. After all, do birthmoms really look at profiles of people our ages? Both adoption agencies that I talked too said that it would be rare for someone to pick us.
...and *I* would tell you that the two adoption agencies you talked to didn't know too much about biological parents and what many tend to do. :)
We adopted one of our babies when we were both 46yrs old. Our next baby came when we were 48yrs; our next one at 50yrs and our youngest baby at 52yrs. We did not use the same agency each time, nor even stayed within our home state. ALL were domestic, private agency adoptions. None were through the foster care system. True, some were special needs, but not seriously so.
I asked our adoption attorney the same question about birthmothers actually choosing 'people our age'. Her comment was that in the 18 plus years she's been an adoption attorney NO birthmother has EVER asked how old any couple is. The birthmother just chose the couple she wanted for her children---based on other things...NOT age.
Don't sell yourself short. If you're active, into various activities...volunteering in the community, etc.......I highly suspect you have an excellent chance of being chosen for another baby. However, I suspect if you go with the two agencies you've already spoken with.......your chances might not be as high! LOL I DO suspect though, that those two agencies have 'outdated ideas' as to what makes a good parent!
My best to you.....
Sincerely,
Linny
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Jayteedee
My husband and I have adopted before. Our daughter is 3 years old through an identified adoption. We would like to add to our family and know how hard it is to find another "miracle identified adoption". However, it seems because we are older...48 and 47....that an identified adoption is our only way to add to our family. After all, do birthmoms really look at profiles of people our ages? Both adoption agencies that I talked too said that it would be rare for someone to pick us.
We were told by private agencies (at the time I was 35, DH was 49) that we would have to wait longer because we were older. In both our experiences, once of the reasons our kid's first families chose us was because we were "older" parents. There is not telling what expecting parents considering adoption desire for their children.
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I decided to nix the two agencies that said I'd only be able to adopt through an identified adoption. Talked with someone else today and she gave me another couple to try. Thanks for the words of wisdom. You made me feel better....not older.
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I am 51, single with a 7 year old adopted from Guatemala. I have been in the process the last 18 mos of trying to adopt from Kazakhstan - but I think that will fail due to changes in the country requirements - does anyone have any advice re: what i can do - should i forget this? is there any chance a domestic adoption would work for me?
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Mom_for_2
I am 51, single with a 7 year old adopted from Guatemala. I have been in the process the last 18 mos of trying to adopt from Kazakhstan - but I think that will fail due to changes in the country requirements - does anyone have any advice re: what i can do - should i forget this? is there any chance a domestic adoption would work for me?
Other than $$, I don't know of any reason you wouldn't be chosen to adopt a baby born domestically! Anymore, seems that fees are the biggest obstacle to anyone's adoption plans. But, that obstacle *can* be worked on. I think you have a good chance.
Sincerely,
Linny
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