Transracial adoption -- what are we in for?

I am not a foster parent (yet) but wanted to comment as I am white and have a biracial child. It is a great thing for a child to grow up and see multiple cultures. I would make sure you are aware of some basic history on their culture as well as local places that may be important. MLK and other civil rights leaders and the like.That is more for an educational understanding.For day to day living, I'd say one hard thing to get used to is hair styling - both genders. If they have natural hair (ie: curly, course) then you will have to determine how to style it - and you will probably need to enlist the help of a pro - many young kids wind up with their hair braided because it's much less work and black hair does not an shuold not be washed daily. There are many types of braids and varying costs. If you live in a predominantly white community you may need to travel to a city nearby to find a salon that deals with black hair.Boys can be easier because you can shave it or trim it close, but you can't just run a BIC over their head - so you still need someone who knows black hair to help. My husband has gone to white barbers and while they were good at what they do and tried hard - he ended up with countless razor bumps and issues because they didn't use the right cutting tools on him. I'm sure not all barbers have this issue but I'm positive my husband will be seeking out people who know his hair from now on.Also if the child is biracial then their hair may be closer to "white hair" (smoother, thinner, less course) or not. you never know. Detangler is your friend lol.Otherwise unless there is a language barrier there shouldnt be much else you would need to know that I can think of.Good luck!

Hello! You will also need to recognize that growing up biracial or in a transracial family is not always easy. I am biracial and I had my share of issues in society. You will need to arm your kids with the ability to respond to people who don't understand their family or choose not to understand their family. It's not just school that you have to worry about. There will be times that your children will need to have the ability to respond and defend themselves when people attack (and they will). I remember being at basketball camp and some girls attacking my mother, who is white, because she "stole" a good man from their culture (my dad is AA). You will not always be there to help them. My parents did an excellent job giving us a way to deal with people who challenged us. They taught us to use humor when people were saying things that made no sense. They also taught us to be strong about our identity and respectfully stand up for ourselves. We also always knew that if there was a problem, my parents would do their best to help us get through it. It was not always possible for them to understand what we were feeling because we were biracial and they were not. I'm sure that was difficult for them. However, they still always listened and had advise for us when situations got tough. I know that things have changed a lot since I was a child, but there are still a lot of people who will have a problem with transracial families (and it goes for all races). You need to recognize that and be willing to help your children understand. Best of luck in your decision!

Our son is still a baby, and while the adoption is transracial for me (I'm cc) it's not for my husband who is AA. A lot depends on your community. We live in a very diverse town with a lot of interracial families. Even when I'm with our son alone, most people think he's my bio son and ask me the equally inappropriate questions strangers ask bio parents (are you breast feeding? How was labor?) questions I don't typically ask folks in the grocery line, kWIM? The only comment we've heard negatively came from a co-worker of my DH, and it was more a comment on our relationship and "how disappointed" she was that he married outside of the AA community. She no longer works with him, but I cannot imagine she'd be too happy having me raise an AA baby. I wonder what my son will hear about that as he gets older. Our son will go to school, and while the school near our home is 47% AA, I suspect he'll get playground comments about his white mom. Also, I find myself much more sensitive to what others say and have to decide when I say something (please don't say those things around our family) or when I'm being oversensitive.

My wife and I have adopted four children, two of them African-American. They have been a great joy and blessing to our lives and I can honestly say that the color of their skin has never been an issue. When I look at our children I notice the smiles, the laughter, the eyes and ears and noses. I don't notice the skin color. These are our children and we love them with all our heart. If we can be of any help to you on your adoption journey please email us: marc@heart4adoption.us or visit our website [url=http://www.heart4adoption.us]heart4adoption - Home[/url]. Adoption grows in the heart, not under it!

I know that things have changed a lot since I was a child, but there are still a lot of people who will have a problem with transracial families (and it goes for all races). You need to recognize that and be willing to help your children understand. Best of luck in your decision!:rockband: