Depressed need some support.

I've never been in your situation, but I would assume that this is normal, or at least not uncommon. Is there a pregnancy resource center you can go to that specializes in adoption? Perhaps you can find a resource through a local adoption attorney...they probably know of places that provide counseling services for mothers considering adoption. A good counselor would probably help you sort through your emotions. If you do decide to put your baby up for adoption, a good counselor would probably be priceless resource after the baby's birth. You could even work it out so that the adoptive family pays for the services...maybe for a certain amount of sessions. We are considering offering this for our expectant mother because we feel that post adoptive counseling is very important for a birth mother. Hope this helps.

Sara, If you want to parent your baby, then I think you really need to listen to what your heart is telling you. Adoption is forever...and you need to be absolutely sure that that is what you want for your child and for yourself. There is no turning back once those papers are signed. Have you received any counseling at all? If not, it's imperative that you find a non-biased counselor, one that is not hooked up with an adoption agency. We have a member here on the forums who can lead you in the right direction as far as seeking counseling. She's a licensed therapist who has great resources. Her user name is bromanchik, and you can Private Message (PM) her by going to her user profile at [url]http://my.adoption.com/bromanchik[/url].

Raven is right - unbiased counseling that give you the opportunity to look at all of your choices should be your first choice. I would be very hesitant to use an adoption agency counselor because even with the best of intentions there will be a bias. Also, if you do end up choosing adoption then you must get your own legal representation. What is discussed now is not always how things end up happening and you need to be aware of YOUR rights and whether or not there are laws in your state that will protect you. Send a message to Bromachick like Raven said. Kind regards,Dickons

Hope my first post wasn't confusing...like the other posters said, an UNBIASED counselor is key. Hopefully you are able to find that. I truly hope you are able to come to a decision that is right for you and that you are comfortable with.

Hello,Sara.I hope this finds you feeling alittle better.The other post are great.You should goto a counselor.I do have something that I did and still do to this day.I gave a child up when I was 19 years old.I didn't get any help and I gave her to my father and step mother.I started writing in a journal because I had a hard time opening up to people.Family and friends were there and always stated their beliefs and concerns.But as I get my journal out and read it and I later shared it with my daughter I know that it was alot of help.It also helped my daughter out also.She got to understand that I did it because I was not ready to be a mom and because I loved her so much I just wanted her to be safe and have a secure place in life.So maybe it will help you understand what kind of emotions you are going through and can help you make your choice.But after you have been writing in it for a couple of weeks go back and reread it all.You will have a better understanding of your thoughts.I hope this helps you out.

Please get unbiased counseling that includes considering ALL of your options including parenting your child. Understand that with semi-open and open adoption, it is not legally binding in most states. That means the potential adoptive parents can stop sending updates and/or having visits/contact at any time. Also know you do NOT have to make a final decision right now. Explore your options and wait until you have your baby to finalize your decision. If possible, you may also want to consider trying out parenting for awhile. You do NOT have to place your baby right away if you need more time to think about things. And no matter how difficult, I think it is important to try and open up to your BF, friends, family and other sources of emotional support (keep posting here!). The worst thing you can do is bottle everything up inside. This is not an easy time, and you are faced with a very difficult decision, but the more info you have about your options and resources, the better prepared you will be to make a decision that is the best for you and your baby.

Hi Sara, PAY ATTENTION TO THOSE EMOTIONS, that is called natural affetion. If you did not have them you would not be normal. They are Godgiven and believe me as the time draws nearer you will experience these emotions to a greater degree!!! Don't rush into a decision you will later regret. Think about yourself. I know your thinking what would be best for your child but you need to think what's best for you too. Definately get some unbiased counselling-not from an adoption agency, but from maybe a midwife who is not an adoptive parent, or someone outside of the circle of people who is involved. Maybe at a crisis pregnancy center. Or you can talk to me anytime. Private email me and I'll give you my email address. I'm a birthmother who's been there and back. You really, really, NEED to think this through. Wait until the very last and then make your decision. There is NO reason to rush into a decision. The fact that you ARE having these emotions or second thoughts is proof that you really don't want to do this, your just trying to live up to a decision you already made. You have the right to change your mind! So do it. Rhonda

Good luck to you, Sara. I'm sure you'll make the right decision for both you and for your baby. As others have already noted, talking with an unbiased counselor can help you sort through your feelings and come to a decision that's right for you and your baby.

We are currently seeking birth moms/parents who are considering adoption as an alternative to parenting for a new documentary series. We would capture the process as it organically unfolds. Our intent is to provide a platform for birth mothers to share their story as she goes through the journey. Who are we looking for? If youre an expectant mother considering adoption, we want to hear your story! We are looking for pregnant women aged: ҕ 18 30 years old ֕ Up to 6 months pregnant (6 mos along and below) ALL ethnic, religious, socio-economic backgrounds Օ From ANY city in the U.S. this is a nation-wide casting ֕ ANY stage in the adoption process will be considered from those who just started considering adoption, to birth moms well into the process It is not our intent to sway the birth mothers decision. Whether she decides to parent or go through the adoption process we will be there. Our documentary will only air from the birth mother's point of view. We are not in the business to victimize or demonize any participant, as this is a family friendly network. The documentary tone is heartwarming, light hearted and educational. We encourage all birth mothers/parents who are considering our offer to research our company before making the call to us. We realize this is a very sensitive time in a mother֒s life and making a decision of this nature doesn't come easy. We have no invested interest in the birth parents final decision. Sincerely, Hudsun Media 323-410-7423 [url=http://www.hudsunmedia.com]hud:sun media | entertainment company dedicated to the art of story telling[/url] casting2@hudsunmedia.com