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I don't know if this is really rude, but Katster reported it. It's Greenmamas response #14:
[url]http://forums.adoption.com/foster-parent-support/379374-feeling-discouraged.html[/url]
Kathy has already addressed the need to stay civil, but it may get nasty as the day progresses.
Celia
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Kaster wants agreement and "poor you" posts only. Too bad that she doesn't understand that honesty is also support. I'm sure she will report the last post on there by Debra too and that post is also okay. It's not rude to disagree or say "i'm offended.I've got soccer pretty much all day today but I'll check in when I can.
Ok... I'm hijacking this thread for a rant! My apologies to you, my mod friends who have adopted. I've had it with some of the foster to adopt parents who seem to have such a sense of entitlement that they hope an fc's relative seeking placement will fail. Sometimes it feels to me like the poor child is a pawn in the game of "Get the Child". Ok... we now return to our regularly scheduled programming.
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Vent away. I agree that some of them do seem to be more concerned about getting the kid than best interest. I also think that many of these are new to foster/adopt and don't really know the whole story. So many don't get good info from CWer's and therefore don't know how it all works, how case plans are made, why they wait to find relatives, etc. More education is needed.
Some of it I'm sure is that some want so desperately to parent, they hear what they want to hear. It happens in other parts of life too. I thought at one time of being a foster parent, but not because I thought of it as a way to build my family. There are many children how so badly need some stablilty in their lives. Of course, I tend to be idealistic: I still hope the mother of my 16 yr old grandson can get her life together. She's 37 and just got out of jail (again). I took Shaunie to see her this afternoon at the halfway house... (You don't have to be adopted to have abandonment issues.)
Um, has anyone see Katster's latest thread? [URL="http://forums.adoption.com/foster-parenting/379036-all-mommys-holla-me-lol.html"]http://forums.adoption.com/foster-parenting/379036-all-mommys-holla-me-lol.html[/URL] Apparently she's decided she should stick to asking questions on the fostering forum instead of the parenting forums. What do you all think?