Can someone please tell me? Want to keep siblings together!

what is their reasoning for NOT keeping the sibs together if they will be in the same state?

All we were told is that their is someone higher on the adoption list. The caseworker planned on placing the child with us, but someone higher up said no. (We also have a 3 yr old placed with us who's adoption should be done in about 45 days. His full brother is being adopted by another family since they were placed in different homes. Both of the children we have were placed in an elderly ladies home and raised together. I wanted them to remain together. I had heard that the mom might be preg and said something to the worker about if the baby was removed that we would like it.) Regardless of medical problems ect.

I should mention that we tried keeping the other sibling together also. However our state says that foster parents have the first right to adopt. They didn't want our lil guy due to his medical problems.

ugh. we had this same problem in CA with our first adoption. we had the baby for 3 months as foster parents and they were going to move him to someone higher on the list when it looked like the case was going to go to adoption. we had a last minute miracle where someone actually acknowledged that moving him was not in his best interest and he got to stay. years later he had a sibling come into care and they actually called us. but the worker who called said to stop thanking her and to thank the judge bc he is the one who made a point to ask if there were any siblings, and told the workers they must call and ask us first as siblings should stay together. she said they don't always track people down, just place the baby with the next family on the list. i think it is a shame. they have already lost their parents....but to lose a siblings too? it is just wrong. i would THINK that as caregivers to the new baby's siblings, you would qualify as a "non-related extended family member"....at least that is what they call it in CA. that is what we were. we were related to our new son, because he was the 1/2 brother of another child we were already raising. in your state, do they look at relatives first? because if so....i would think they would have to look at you first. i would normally say get an attorney. i don't know how much you want to rock the boat though since it sounds like the older one's adoption is not done. that is a tough spot to be in. you may want to consult an attorney who knows the rules/laws in your area and see what they recommend. i know sometimes that areas have foster parent advocacy groups. that might help also. i have no idea how to tell you how to find one other than to google, or call a local ffa (private foster family agency) and ask them if they know of one. good luck in this...i know it is hard to navigate the system sometimes.

It does not matter that there is someone higher up than you. YOU have the sibling. This new baby should be with you and the sibling. I would raise holy heck to get the child placed with you. I would totally go above someone's head on this one.

I've been in this boat for six months now, when my kids' baby sister came into care in a different county. It's been EXTREMELY difficult, with the county she's in having promised the foster parents a quick TPR and adoption by them. The county knew about us as soon as they put her name in the system. They notified our SW immediately and were told we had been waiting for her since birth expecting we would need to get her at some point, and that we were adopting her siblings. I've had to fight like crazy to get visits for my kids to see her, even though UNTIL she went into foster care, she HAD been visiting my kids. I've posted several times about the battles trying to keep the kids together, it's been long, drawn out and very ugly. PM me if you like. I've printed out the state's policy on families and placements, and everything that's happened goes against all the policies. Educate yourself, then do everything you have to do and don't stop. You shouldn't have to fight this battle, but you're not alone.

Thanks MommytoEli, Bethany, Bamamom for your post. Our caseworker that did our homestudy told us today that we should have first rights to the sibling. They are still working on getting the baby over to our state currently. Grrrr she's 8 days old today. I wish I knew if she is still in the hospital or in someone's home. She's a month early and is drug exposed. I also asked if an ICP extended family relative placement could be done possibly. ....Thanks Mommy for the ideal...I'm going to give it another week and keep praying and see what happens. I plan to read your post Bamamom as soon as I get a chance. I will keep you in my prayers also.