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And obviously I'm not over it and still stewing about it, because I've blogged it, posted a FB update about it, and now I'm here. Because I'm still so shocked/hurt/stunned/blown away. Completely.
I was with the boys at the Y. A women stopped to talk to the boys, which I honestly dont mind. Unless something stupid comes out of their mouths. And sure enough҅
Did your mom find you on a doorstep?Ӕ
:( :(
It's consumed me today. I go between tears and rage and hurt and...everything. I know we're all going to rant and rave about the stupidity of it, but I can't get over how unbelievably crushed, devastated, hurt, etc, I am.
Thankfully, Josh is shy enough in public that he won't talk to adults who talk to him (he's not quite 4) and I think my voice had enough rage in it that she backed off, but good grief. And this was AFTER she grilled Josh about if Preston was his brother, and insisted that they don't look anything alike. (And they truly don't!)
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(((((((HUGS))))))))
I hope that woman could feel your pain and rage and feels deeply ashamed. I would have been stupefied into silence, and shaking with rage. It's probably best you couldn't think of anything good to say, this way it showed your boys you take the high-road.
Ignorant woman. She really should be ashamed of herself, wherever she is right now. :mad:
oh my heavens!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so sorry that this woman happened to bump into you guys...what a piece of work...
why? I can't even begin to fathom how someone in this day and age ASKS that?
I mean I have a friend IRL that is an adoptive mom to 3 teens and she told me one on one that her oldest was an abandoned child outside a door (not hers) with a note, but we are close friends, she doesn't blab that info out to joe blow or susie smith on the street in FRONT OF THE KIDS.....
But NO one should be asking that of total strangers...heck I don't ask specifics from my friends irl unless they want to share.
I'm so so so so sosososososososo sorry. (((((hugs)))))))
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I think you handled it well.
I usually pop off with an "EXCUSE ME?". Unfortunately, my children know that I am not a happy camper when I start talking in that tone of voice, so then they are all ears listening to see why Mom is so upset. Thankfully it has not happened often, but it is a shame that it happens at all.
I'm sorry that you had to go through that. You can help the ignorant, there is nothing you can do for the stupid. They know and choose to continue on their path. Judging by how upset this woman made you, I would say she falls in the stupid category.
That is terrible especially comming from an adult. In 5th grade I had someone say that to me that "You wasn't born you were found on a doorstep" and the teacher devoted an entire day to educating the class as he had overheard it and was seething. The teacher was the one to call my Momma up and tell her.
Some people are just idiots and have absolutely no brains.
Sometimes in these type of situations we are so gobsmacked we cannot even think of a reply because the statements are so outrageous.
I would have asked the woman if she left a baby on a door step and was wondering if she forgot where. But that is only after the fact thinking.
I am so sorry you had to endure such idiocy.
EZ
Oh Jen... so sorry you had to bump into that particular piece of nasty. Breathe, vent, and breathe some more... Here's hoping you get it all out so that we won't be reading about you next time you bump in to her... :) Did you laugh? Trying to make you laugh... don't go in to the New Year with this bad energy!
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I am so, so sorry someone said such a hurtful thing about your beautiful children. PLEASE, if you can, don't give her words any power over your life. I so, so understand how those words can hurt, and eat you up, but letting them gives her stupidity power and the LAST thing you want is to reward idiots with power in our lives.
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I think with adoptive families people think they can equate the way our family is built with a family where a biological child looks much different than their parents. My sister gets that her red head is a mail man baby all the time. My cousin is dark hair, dark eyes, as is her husband and her first born. Her second is light haired with blue eyes. I ask her all the time...where did he come from?? She always says, I don't know...I think he has the same father as your kids. We both have said we need to stop saying that when they kids get a little bigger :)I would be upset if a stranger said something that rude about my children, because emotionally not looking like your parents is completely different than not looking like your parents because you are adopted...you know? Some people take the "treat it the same as a biological family" thing too far.
aclee
I think with adoptive families people think they can equate the way our family is built with a family where a biological child looks much different than their parents. My sister gets that her red head is a mail man baby all the time. My cousin is dark hair, dark eyes, as is her husband and her first born. Her second is light haired with blue eyes. I ask her all the time...where did he come from?? She always says, I don't know...I think he has the same father as your kids. We both have said we need to stop saying that when they kids get a little bigger :)