please help

I won't be any help here, but I hope you find her. But even if she's was in denial I'm sure once she accepted that it did happen I'm sure she would think about you. Good luck in your search.

I wouldn't necessarily take what those papers say as truth, especially if you were born in 1974, as your name implies. Often in those days, paperwork was falsified and "case notes" were written that were completely untrue. Routinely, in those days, women were not even allowed to see their babies, so it's not always that they didn't want to. But assuming it is true, that she was in denial (and it could be because she knew she couldn't keep you that she detached emotionally) and didn't see you, that doesn't mean she forgot you. My guess is she has always thought about you. I don't know one birth mother who has forgotten about her child/ren.

As a birthmom.. several people told me not to see my daughter.. that it would be easier if I never saw her... I was told she had already been taken from the hospital ..when I asked to see her... then a nurse came into my room and asked me if I would like to see her.. I told her what I was told... she said that they don't really like birthmoms to see their babies.. they might chance their mines... I saw my daughter through a glass window all of 2 mins.... I never ever forgot her... It sounds like your mom might have been very young at the time... a mother never ever forgets her child... she loved you so much ...she gave you life... than she had to give up ALL rights to you.. and walk away... yes she will know you and you will know her... My love and prayers are with you both... I found my daughter and I gave her up for adoption 50 years ago and she always felt my love for her... Have you used a search angel to help you find your birthmom?

I can see how a woman would have to put all her feelings in a little box, lock it, and hide it away in order to do the most difficult thing for her child - give her away. I feel like I've done that, sometimes for years at a time... just thinking about her in passing and hoping all is well, then immediately changing the subject. Not dealing with the roller coaster of emotions early on seems to be taking its toll on me now. She loved you. That's why she gave you a better life.