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[FONT="Garamond"]Hello. My name is Jessica. I am 20 years old. Soon to be 21. I joined this site i think like a month or two ago and just now have been ready to talk. I am from Ohio. Pretty boring here. I am 12 weeks pregnant and I found out I was pregnant on April 22 and I immediately knew my husband and I could not parent this one as well as our 2 year old and 6 month old. From birth of our 6 month old she has been living with my husbands mom and she now has custody of her. I was not able to cope with having two little ones at all. I am so upset with myself still about not be women enough I guess. In jan. of this year my mental health got really bad and I stopped taking care of our house and let everything go down hill. So the neighbors called 241 kids on me and my 2 year old got placed with my husbands mom as well. I still have custody of her though and I am working very hard on getting her back and start my government parenting classes here very soon. I still see both girls as much as I can and I give his mom as much money as I can so she can get them stuff. So when I found out I was pregnant I knew we just couldnt do it. I called the adoption agency by me and am now going through the process. Matthew was really mad at first about my decision but he is now on board and he understands that we can not give this baby the best life he or she deserves.
Yesterday we heard the heart beat and it was so hard not to be excited or want to get attached. I am terrified to give birth this time. I have no clue what to expect.
I am sure manu people look down upon my husband and I for our decision. But, it is the best for this baby and our children we already have. [/FONT]
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