intersex baby

I would adopt an intersexed baby in a heartbeat. That said, abortion is a personal decision. I believe a woman has a right to choose and would not want my willingness to parent be a reason someone was guilted into not making her choice

Yes, it's possible for an intersex child to be adopted, there are people willing. I would of have done for my first or third adoptions (second had to be a girl for definite because of my first's needs). There are quite a few intersex children adopted internationally I think, I don't know about domestic adoptions. The parents need to be completely open on gender and not care whether they have a boy or girl, since it's not considered a good idea to operate on a baby now. If you assign them the wrong gender, they then have to spend a miserable childhood trying to live with itHOWEVER, if she wants an abortion, don't try to persuade her otherwise. It's her choice, and she will know her own mind, and pressuring her won't achieve anything except upset and annoy her. If you are a true friend, you'll care about her well being above all else. Let her know you will be there as a listening ear if she wants it, but DON'T try and pressure her

The poster did not say she would pressure her friend- just that she wanted to talk to her about adoption as an option. That's fair. Women should know ALL of their choices before they make a choice. Maybe her friend assumes that no one would adopt this baby and that's not true. If she has an abortion and then finds out later that there are wonderful people out there who would have been willing to adopt her baby, would she regret the abortion? At that point, she wouldn't be able to change her mind. A true friend would give her all the information up front so that she can make an informed decision. I congratulate the original poster for wanting to be a true friend.

I can only speak from my own experience of this situation. When one of my friends became pregnant, several others kept pushing her away from her choice (abortion) and telling her it was wrong, and showing her anti-choice literature etc. Well, she went ahead with an abortion, and she was also never as close to those 'friends' again, she didn't confide in them any more, and cut off contact altogether with one. She was very angry with the way they actedI'm not saying don't mention it at all, but if you push your friendship might suffer for it

I think it's fair to tell your friend that there are people who'd adopt her baby if she chose to release him/her for adoption. I can also tell you that even if a child is born intersex-ed........the severity of the issue can vary greatly. And, even if the child is thought to have more involved issues, many of them can be resolved soon after birth. ( Some medications may be required if the child is having difficulties with the adrenal glands, etc) And, while techniques and surgeries may have been poorly applied many years ago, the detailed chromosome testing that can be done these days will go far to determine exactly what gender the child might be. Sincerely, Linny

Of all the conditions a child could be born with, I know there are loving families who would fight to have that baby. Best of luck to your friend in making her difficult decision.

I am sure there would be many families who would be happy to adopt this baby.

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